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Hi Almost,
Well done on taking the first step in your recovery. Its certainly not an easy one for sure.
Perhaps you could start your own topic (thread) so that people can read and reply to you and you can tell your story.
It sounds all too familiar to me, the lying, sneaking behaviour that is a compulsive gambler. I’m not sure where you are located, but things like self exclusion, giving up your debit cards to your husband and letting him take control of the finances (that’s a hard one I know), attending GA, and reading and posting here, all these things can help you find a life where gambling no longer rules.
You can get your life back. Its not easy, in fact its really hard work, it wont happen in a day either, but in time you can live a gamble free life.
I hope you start your own thread, and get the support you deserve.
Take care K xI understand your point.
Whatever works for you.
I know, for myself, that my gambling increased as the years went on. Sure, I stopped for a little while, but always went back. I would hate to see anyone go through what I did if there was a way to avoid it. That’s all.
Take care, KOh B,
Heres what i know about you…….
Think it or not, you are one super strong lady.
I know you are tired, BUT
I also know that you will fight tooth and nail for Jen, and that beautiful baby.
She is blessed to have you as her mum.
When it comes to our kids, the mumma bear ALWAYS comes out.
Love, thoughts and prayers to you, Jen and that little boy.
Just remember you. You’re the foundation, and if you don’t look after that, well, we know what happens.
Make sure you have some me time, even if it is only a few minutes a day. Kiss that baby and play with his feet for me (my favourite part)
No news on my end with Brea yet. (he doesn’t want to come out!)
Love ya girl,
K xxxxxBringing you back to the top!
How are you?
Did you manage to look into that blocker?
We need as many barriers as we can get….everything helps.
Hope to hear from you!
Love K xHow is it, that we KNOW what gambling does to us, that we KNOW that we cant stop, big win or bigger loss, and yet we still do it?
It is not logical thinking. Our brain is full of thoughts to gamble. Once you get up your barriers and ensure you cant gamble, it gives your brain a chance to start thinking of other things.
I read your post and wondered how you are doing?
I read your post and saw myself! Before i came here, and finally faced my addiction head on.
I hope you are doing ok.
Take care, K xI’m bringing your post back to the top.
Have you put up any barriers to keep yourself safe?
I hope you are well, and managing your addiction.
Take care, K xJust wanted to see how you were going?
Did you manage to block your phone?
Hope things are well with you, and your life is on the improve.
Take care, K xI’m bringing you to the top.
You are remembered here my friend.
I’m going back to my roots, so I’m going to pull up some old posts and see what happens. Time for me to start working my recovery….ive been too quiet for too long.
Love K xxI just read your thread and was wondering how things were going?
Did you manage to tell your fiancée?
When I told my husband I just laid every debt on the dining room table and when he walked in from work I told him I needed to show him something.
I truly thought he would leave.
He didn’t.
I hope that you are doing ok, and have put up some barriers to keep yourself safe.
Love K xxYou are dead right, there is no cure for this addiction.
Like any illness, medication is required.
Whatever that medicine may be….GA, GT, self exclusion
Taking that medicine is working recovery.
I hope you are well, I loved reading your posts, to see the positives slowly emerge.
The gambling fog is lifting for you, what a wonderful feeling.
I too was amazed at how much time I spent gambling. And now, all these years later I am amazed how I ever found the time to gamble. I feel like I don’t have a single minute to spare!
That, my friend, is called living!!!!!!
Take care, K xxJust thought id bump your post up a bit…..
How are you?
Have you put any barriers in place?
Will power is simply not enough….if you have the means and the opportunity its just to easy to gamble ‘a little bit’, which then, as you know, turns into ‘a lot’!!!
Have you considered GA? I admit, it wasn’t for me but I did try it. Doing something, anything is better than doing nothing.
Hope you’re ok.
Love K xJust checking in with you…..
Hope all is well in your world.
K xYou’re right, nothing will be the same.
I know you have hurt your family and friends, unfortunately this addiction doesn’t care who gets hurt.
You have done what you can for now to rectify the situation with your business. I know its daunting, but nothing is un fixable. And while you may have lost your friend and your mum, for now, working hard on yourself to begin recovery is important for you. You are important.
We have all made mistakes, done terrible things in the grips of this terrible addiction. Just worry about today. You cannot control how other people see and feel about you, yes they are angry, but in time, if you work hard, things may turn around. You have blocked yourself from all sites, that’s a great step.
I don’t know if you will find the answer as to why you gambled. I never really have.
Accepting that the money is gone is a very hard thing to do.
All you can do is move forward, take the steps you need to work recovery, life will get better in time.
Take care K xxGambling addiction is progressive.
When I first started gambling I used to go with my mum once a week with a tiny amount of money and we would sit together and have a lovely hour or so.
I don’t know when that changed for me, it doesn’t matter really but the longer I kept the secret the worse it got. To the point where eventually I had to come clean to my husband and we had to sell our house to cover the gambling debt, which by the way still wasn’t enough for me…..I then proceeded to gamble away the money that was left over until we had nothing.
When I came to this site screaming for help I took every single bit of advice given to me by the members here. Yes, it took a little time because in truth I really didn’t want to stop but I knew that if I didn’t I was going to lose what little I had left, not to mention my family who I had already put through so much.
So I bit the bullet, went to GA, self excluded, gave all finances to my husband and told him that whenever I bought something I would give him the receipt.
That was 8 years ago. My life is far from perfect, we proboably will never own a house (something that took me a long time to accept) BUT………I have my life back. I can breathe and think clearly, I am present for my husband and my children. The bills are paid and what debt we owe are debts we have accumulated together. No more lies. No more feeling sick. I wont say I haven’t gambled in the last 8 years, I have tested myself. Half a dozen times I would say. My self exclusion is my saviour. I simply cannot gamble.
Telling my husband was the most horrific thing. I KNEW he was going to leave me and take the kids.
I was wrong
He stood by me. While he didn’t understand, he didn’t need to. He just let me do what I needed to get well.
I wish I could say that you can do this by yourself, with no accountablilty to anyone. Unfortunately, the longer we hide our addiction, the better we get at it until there is no option but to come clean, and for a lot of us here the damage to our bank accounts, to our family and to our life and sanity is off the charts.
You proved to yourself that you cannot gamble like a ‘normal’ person.
Do something now, you are so worth it.
Love K xxxI’ve been posting here for 9 years!!!
There’s been times, as the years have gone on they i have posted less and less but I always come back to what I know! It’s been a lifeline for me, so I guess use it as much as you need to!!!
Congratulations on your gamble free time!
Love K xxx