[kathryn]

Jeg er så lei meg for at du har funnet deg selv i denne situasjonen. nJeg leste de siste innleggene dine tidligere og var ikke helt sikker på hva jeg skulle si. For det første er det ingen unnskyldning for overgrep, rent og enkelt. n Folk uten tvang til å gamble synes det er så vanskelig å forstå hvordan tankene våre fungerer, det er som menn (forstår ikke helt hvordan det føles å føde) hvis vi bare kunne stoppe ved en hatt, ville det ikke være behov for dette nettstedet . Det er en avhengighet, det samme som narkotika eller alkohol. nJeg forstår partnernes frustrasjon helt, det er en tillitsfeil. Jeg godtar imidlertid ikke aggresjon. Jeg tør påstå at han føler seg såret, sint og forrådt, og jeg skjønner at jeg satte mannen min gjennom den absolutte vrideren. Igjen og igjen. nIzzi, du må sette opp hver eneste barriere du kan, alt på en gang. Det du har gjort tidligere fungerer ikke. Denne avhengigheten venter på å slå til når som helst sårbart øyeblikk. n Noen ganger betyr ikke hvorfor hvorfor, jeg vet fortsatt ikke hvorfor jeg gjorde det, og jeg har lenge gitt opp håpet om å finne ut av det. Jeg så etter enhver grunn til å gamble, det spilte ingen rolle så lenge jeg satt foran den skjermen. n Det du imidlertid kan gjøre i dag, er å gjøre alt du kan for å gjøre deg trygg. Du må faktisk sette deg selv først, og gjøre det du trenger. Vi kan bare kontrollere oss selv, hva andre tenker, føler og sier er ute av våre hender. nJeg håper du får litt klarhet de neste dagene og tar valg som fungerer for DEG! Du fortjener et lykkelig liv, denne avhengigheten gjør at det er best å stoppe det. Ingen av oss ba om det, jeg hadde aldri satset på det første hvis jeg hadde visst det. n Ta vare på deg selv, nLove K xxxx

[kathryn]

Sinto muito por você ter se encontrado nesta situação. nLei seus últimos posts antes e não tinha certeza do que dizer. Em primeiro lugar, não há desculpa para o abuso, pura e simplesmente. nPessoas sem a compulsão de jogar acham tão difícil entender como nossa mente funciona, é como os homens (não entendendo realmente como é dar à luz) se pudéssemos parar na queda de um chapéu, não haveria necessidade deste site . É um vício, o mesmo que drogas ou álcool. nEu entendo totalmente a frustração de seus parceiros, é uma quebra de confiança. Eu, entretanto, não tolero agressão. Ouso dizer que ele está se sentindo magoado, com raiva e traído, e eu entendo isso, coloquei meu marido em um tormento absoluto. De novo e de novo. nIzzi, você precisa colocar todas as barreiras que puder, de uma vez. O que você fez anteriormente não está funcionando. Esse vício está esperando para atacar a qualquer momento vulnerável. Às vezes, o porquê não importa, ainda não sei por que fiz isso e há muito tempo perdi a esperança de descobrir. Procurei todo e qualquer motivo para apostar, não importava, desde que eu estivesse sentado na frente daquela tela. nO que você pode fazer hoje, no entanto, é fazer tudo o que puder para ficar seguro. Na verdade, você precisa se colocar em primeiro lugar aqui e fazer o que for preciso. Só podemos controlar a nós mesmos, o que os outros pensam, sentem e dizem está fora de nossas mãos. n Espero que você tenha alguma clareza nos próximos dias e faça escolhas que funcionem para VOCÊ! Você merece uma vida feliz, esse vício está fazendo o melhor para impedir que isso aconteça. Nenhum de nós pediu, eu nunca teria feito aquela primeira aposta se soubesse. nCuide-se, nLove K xxxx

[kathryn]

I’m so sorry you have found yourself in this situation.
nI read your last few posts earlier and wasn’t quite sure what to say. Firstly there’s no excuse for abuse, pure and simple.
nPeople without the compulsion to gamble find it so difficult to understand how our mind works, it’s like men ( not really understanding how it feels to give birth) if we could just stop at the drop of a hat there would be no need for this site. It’s an addiction, the same as drugs or alcohol.
nI totally understand your partners frustration, its a breech of trust. I don’t, however condone aggression. I dare say he’s feeling hurt, angry and betrayed, and I get that, I put my husband through the absolute wringer. Over and over.
nIzzi, you need to put up every single barrier you can, all at once. What you have done previously is not working. This addiction is waiting to pounce at any vulnerable moment.
nSometimes the why doesn’t matter, I still don’t know why I did it, and I’ve long given up hope of finding out. I looked for any and every reason to gamble, it didn’t matter as long as I was sitting in front of that screen.
nWhat you can do today however, is do all you can to make yourself safe. You actually need to put yourself first here, and do whatever you need to. We can only control ourselves, what others think, feel and say is out of our hands.
nI hope you get some clarity in the next few days and make choices that work for YOU! You deserve a happy life, this addiction is doing it’s best to stop that happening. None of us asked for it, I would never have made that first bet if I had known.
nTake care of yourself,
nLove K xxxx

[kathryn]

Lamento mucho que se haya encontrado en esta situación. nLeí sus últimas publicaciones antes y no estaba muy seguro de qué decir. En primer lugar, no hay excusa para el abuso, simple y llanamente. nLas personas sin la compulsión de apostar encuentran tan difícil entender cómo funciona nuestra mente, es como los hombres (sin entender realmente cómo se siente dar a luz) si pudiéramos detenernos en un abrir y cerrar de ojos, no habría necesidad de este sitio. . Es una adicción, al igual que las drogas o el alcohol. nEntiendo totalmente la frustración de su pareja, es una falta de confianza. Sin embargo, no apruebo la agresión. Me atrevo a decir que se siente herido, enojado y traicionado, y lo entiendo, puse a mi esposo en el escurridor absoluto. Una y otra vez. nIzzi, debe colocar todas las barreras que pueda, todas a la vez. Lo que ha hecho anteriormente no está funcionando. Esta adicción está esperando atacar en cualquier momento vulnerable. nA veces el por qué no importa, todavía no sé por qué lo hice y hace tiempo que he perdido la esperanza de averiguarlo. Busqué todas y cada una de las razones para apostar, no importaba mientras estuviera sentado frente a esa pantalla. n Sin embargo, lo que puede hacer hoy es hacer todo lo posible para estar seguro. En realidad, debes ponerte a ti mismo en primer lugar aquí y hacer lo que sea necesario. Solo podemos controlarnos a nosotros mismos, lo que otros piensan, sienten y dicen está fuera de nuestras manos. n¡Espero que obtenga algo de claridad en los próximos días y tome decisiones que funcionen para USTED! Te mereces una vida feliz, esta adicción está haciendo lo mejor para evitar que eso suceda. Ninguno de nosotros lo pidió, nunca hubiera hecho esa primera apuesta si lo hubiera sabido. nCuídate, nLove K xxxx

[kathryn]

Saya sangat menyesal Anda telah menemukan diri Anda dalam situasi ini. nSaya membaca beberapa posting terakhir Anda sebelumnya dan tidak yakin harus berkata apa. Pertama, tidak ada alasan untuk penyalahgunaan, murni dan sederhana. nOrang-orang tanpa paksaan untuk berjudi merasa sangat sulit untuk memahami bagaimana pikiran kita bekerja, itu seperti laki-laki (tidak benar-benar memahami bagaimana rasanya melahirkan) jika kita bisa berhenti begitu saja, tidak akan ada kebutuhan untuk situs ini . Itu kecanduan, sama seperti narkoba atau alkohol. nSaya benar-benar memahami frustrasi pasangan Anda, itu adalah sungsang kepercayaan. Saya tidak, bagaimanapun, memaafkan agresi. Saya berani mengatakan dia merasa terluka, marah dan dikhianati, dan saya mengerti, saya menempatkan suami saya melalui pemeras mutlak. Lagi dan lagi. nIzzi, Anda harus memasang setiap penghalang yang Anda bisa, sekaligus. Apa yang Anda lakukan sebelumnya tidak berhasil. Kecanduan ini menunggu untuk menerkam setiap saat yang rentan. nTerkadang alasannya tidak penting, saya masih tidak tahu mengapa saya melakukannya, dan saya sudah lama putus asa untuk mencari tahu. Saya mencari setiap dan setiap alasan untuk berjudi, tidak masalah selama saya duduk di depan layar itu. nApa yang dapat Anda lakukan hari ini adalah melakukan semua yang Anda bisa untuk membuat diri Anda aman. Anda benar-benar perlu menempatkan diri Anda terlebih dahulu di sini, dan melakukan apa pun yang Anda perlukan. Kita hanya bisa mengendalikan diri kita sendiri, apa yang dipikirkan, dirasakan, dan dikatakan orang lain berada di luar kendali kita. nSaya harap Anda mendapatkan kejelasan dalam beberapa hari ke depan dan membuat pilihan yang sesuai untuk ANDA! Anda berhak mendapatkan kehidupan yang bahagia, kecanduan ini melakukan yang terbaik untuk menghentikan hal itu terjadi. Tak satu pun dari kami yang memintanya, saya tidak akan pernah membuat taruhan pertama itu jika saya tahu. nJaga dirimu, nLove K xxxx

[kathryn]

Nagyon sajnálom, hogy ilyen helyzetbe került. n Olvastam az utolsó néhány hozzászólásodat korábban, és nem tudtam, mit mondjak. Először is nincs mentség a visszaélésre, tiszta és egyszerű. nA szerencsejáték -kényszer nélküli emberek olyan nehéz megérteni, hogyan működik az elménk, olyan, mint a férfiak (nem igazán értik, milyen érzés szülni), ha csak megállnánk egy kalap cseppnél, nem lenne szükség erre az oldalra . Ez függőség, ugyanaz, mint a drog vagy az alkohol. n Teljesen megértem partnerei csalódottságát, ez a bizalom szaga. De nem fogadom el az agressziót. Bátran merem állítani, hogy bántottnak, dühösnek és elárultnak érzi magát, és ezt megértem, átengedem a férjemet. Újra és újra. nIzzi, fel kell tenned minden akadályt, amit csak tudsz, egyszerre. Amit korábban tettél, az nem működik. Ez a függőség arra vár, hogy minden sebezhető pillanatban lerohanjon. nNéha a miért nem számít, még mindig nem tudom, miért tettem, és már rég feladtam a reményt, hogy megtudjam. Minden okot kerestem a szerencsejátékra, nem számított, amíg a képernyő előtt ültem. nMa azonban ma megteheti, hogy mindent megtesz annak érdekében, hogy biztonságban legyen. Valójában itt kell önmagát előtérbe helyeznie, és mindent meg kell tennie. Csak saját magunk irányíthatjuk, hogy mások mit gondolnak, éreznek és mondanak ki a kezünkből. n Remélem, hogy a következő néhány napban tisztán látja a dolgokat, és Önnek megfelelő döntéseket hoz! Megérdemelsz egy boldog életet, ez a függőség mindent megtesz, hogy megakadályozza ezt. Egyikünk sem kérte, soha nem tettem volna meg az első fogadást, ha tudtam volna. nVigyázz magadra, nLove K xxxx

[kathryn]

Jiddispjaċini ħafna li sibt ruħek f'din is-sitwazzjoni. n Qrajt l-aħħar ftit karigi tiegħek qabel u ma kontx ċert x'għandi ngħid. L-ewwelnett m'hemm l-ebda skuża għal abbuż, pur u sempliċi. nPersuni mingħajr il-kompulsjoni li jilagħbu jsibuha daqshekk diffiċli biex jifhmu kif taħdem moħħna, huwa bħall-irġiel (li ma jifhmux verament kif tħoss li twelled) li kieku nistgħu nieqfu biss bil-qatra ta 'kappell ma jkun hemm l-ebda ħtieġa għal dan is-sit . Huwa vizzju, l-istess bħad-drogi jew l-alkoħol. nIifhem kompletament il-frustrazzjoni ta 'l-imsieħba tiegħek, huwa breech ta' fiduċja. Madankollu, ma naċċettax l-aggressjoni. Niddejjaq ngħid li qed iħossu mweġġa ', irrabjat u ttradut, u jien nirċievi dan, inqiegħed lil żewġi permezz tal-wringer assolut. Terġa u terġa. nIzzi, għandek bżonn tpoġġi kull barriera li tista ', f'daqqa. Dak li għamilt qabel mhux qed jaħdem. Din il-vizzju qed tistenna li toħroġ fi kwalunkwe mument vulnerabbli. nKultant l-għaliex ma jimpurtax, għadni ma nafx għalfejn għamilt dan, u ilni nieqaf mit-tama li nsib. Fittixt kull raġuni biex nilgħab, ma jimpurtax sakemm kont qiegħed quddiem dak l-iskrin. nDan dak li tista 'tagħmel illum huwa li tagħmel dak kollu li tista' biex tagħmel lilek innifsek sikur. Int fil-fatt trid tpoġġi lilek innifsek l-ewwel hawn, u tagħmel dak kollu li għandek bżonn. Nistgħu biss nikkontrollaw lilna nfusna, dak li ħaddieħor jaħseb, iħoss u jgħid hu minn idejna. nispera li jkollok ċarezza fil-jiem li ġejjin u tagħmel għażliet li jaħdmu għalik! Int ħaqqek ħajja kuntenta, din il-vizzju qed tagħmel l-aħjar li twaqqaf dak li jiġri. Ħadd minna ma talabha, jien qatt ma kont nagħmel dik l-ewwel imħatra kieku kont naf. n Ħu ħsieb tiegħek innifsek, nĦobb K xxxx

[kathryn]

Мне очень жаль, что вы оказались в такой ситуации. n Я прочитал несколько ваших последних сообщений ранее и не совсем знал, что сказать. Во-первых, нет оправдания злоупотреблениям, в чистом виде. Людям, не склонным к азартным играм, так трудно понять, как работает наш разум, это как мужчины (не совсем понимающие, каково это – рожать), если бы мы могли просто остановиться на мгновение, в этом сайте не было бы необходимости . Это зависимость, такая же, как наркотики или алкоголь. n Я полностью понимаю разочарование вашего партнера, это слабость доверия. Однако я не одобряю агрессию. Осмелюсь сказать, что он чувствует себя обиженным, злым и преданным, и я понимаю, что заставила своего мужа полностью выжить. Снова и снова. nIzzi, вам нужно поставить все препятствия, которые вы можете, все сразу. То, что вы делали ранее, не работает. Эта зависимость ждет, чтобы наброситься на нее в любой уязвимый момент. nИногда не имеет значения, почему, я до сих пор не знаю, зачем я это сделал, и я давно потерял надежду выяснить это. Я искал все причины для игры, это не имело значения, пока я сидел перед экраном. Однако сегодня вы можете сделать все возможное, чтобы обезопасить себя. На самом деле вам нужно поставить себя на первое место и делать все, что вам нужно. Мы можем контролировать только себя, то, что думают, чувствуют и говорят другие, не в наших руках. n Я надеюсь, что в ближайшие несколько дней вы получите некоторую ясность и сделаете выбор, который будет работать для ВАС! Вы заслуживаете счастливой жизни, эта зависимость делает все возможное, чтобы этого не произошло. Никто из нас об этом не просил, я бы никогда не сделал первую ставку, если бы знал. n Береги себя, nLove K xxxx

[kathryn]

I had forgotten about the word play, I used it every single time! I never went for a bet……never!
nAlways a play and usually a ‘little’ play, that was, at the end, never ever little!
nI think calling it anything else was admitting my addiction, even though I knew I was a CG years before I did anything about it.
nGreat discussion point! Another memory to keep me grounded!
nTake care, K xxxx
n
n

[kathryn]

Sending you a big fat hug from Oz!
nRG is right, moving forward really is the ONLY option.
nI don’t know how it happens, how the tiny urge turns to a big regret. Put your barriers up. Means and opportunity play a massive part.
nHALT…….
nHungry
nAngry
nLonely
nTired
nAll triggers!
nLike Dory says, just keep swimming.
nIt’s all we can do. You deserve better, you are a wonderful, kind caring woman. Don’t let this revolting addiction have a say in your life anymore!
nTake care lovely friend,
nK xxxxx

[kathryn]

Vă trimit o mare îmbrățișare grasă de la Oz! nRG are dreptate, mersul înainte este într-adevăr singura opțiune. n Nu știu cum se întâmplă, cum micul îndemn se transformă într-un mare regret. Puneți barierele. Mijloacele și oportunitățile joacă un rol masiv. nHALT ……. nHungry nAngry nLonely nTired nAll triggers! nCum spune Dory, continuă să înoți. nEste tot ce putem face. Meriți mai bine, ești o femeie minunată și amabilă. Nu mai lăsa această dependență revoltătoare să aibă un cuvânt de spus în viața ta! n Aveți grijă prieten frumos, nK xxxxx

[kathryn]

Sending you a big fat hug from Oz!
nRG is right, moving forward really is the ONLY option.
nI don’t know how it happens, how the tiny urge turns to a big regret. Put your barriers up. Means and opportunity play a massive part.
nHALT…….
nHungry
nAngry
nLonely
nTired
nAll triggers!
nLike Dory says, just keep swimming.
nIt’s all we can do. You deserve better, you are a wonderful, kind caring woman. Don’t let this revolting addiction have a say in your life anymore!
nTake care lovely friend,
nK xxxxx

[kathryn]

Vă trimit o mare îmbrățișare grasă de la Oz! nRG are dreptate, mersul înainte este într-adevăr singura opțiune. n Nu știu cum se întâmplă, cum micul îndemn se transformă într-un mare regret. Puneți barierele. Mijloacele și oportunitățile joacă un rol masiv. nHALT ……. nHungry nAngry nLonely nTired nAll triggers! nCum spune Dory, continuă să înoți. nEste tot ce putem face. Meriți mai bine, ești o femeie minunată și amabilă. Nu mai lăsa această dependență revoltătoare să aibă un cuvânt de spus în viața ta! n Aveți grijă prieten frumos, nK xxxxx

[kathryn]

I have reported the last post on your thread to admin as I feel it is Detrimental to recovery. Even those games (your money or not) keeps this addiction alive and that is not one bit helpful in my book. Anyway, I’m Kathryn and I’ve been hanging around this site for almost 11 years. Apart from a few slips I have managed to stay gamble free since joining GT. I am a self excluder, best thing I have ever done, between that and this site my life was saved. I was dying a very slow death. I lost my house many years ago due to my addiction. I know regret is not healthy but that is my biggest in my life so far (hopefully there won’t be any more!) there’s no chance of another. I’ve accepted that, but I don’t like it very much! Sounds like your 6 month day was a beautiful one, I’m in Australia and winter has hit us hard! Well done on your gamble free time, that is a great effort. It’s not easy that’s for sure. ODAAT is a great philosophy, I remember when I first stopped I was doing 30 minutes at a time at one stage, it was all I could cope with . My exclusion however has been my greatest barrier, the thought of being thrown out of a venue or tapped on the shoulder by management was more than enough for me! All of my slips have been because I didn’t exclude soon enough and it lapsed. So of course I’d just test myself out a little bit. Money wise it wasn’t a lot but the way I felt about myself, the shame and self loathing was terrible, and I’d exclude ASAP. Not sure when the last slip was to be honest, quite a few years ago now, but my exclusion has run out again and with covid the venue where they do it isn’t open as yet. So that’s my first job post covid. Anyway, I just wanted to say hi, let you know you’re doing great, and I hope you have a wonderful weekend!
nLove K xx

[kathryn]

Good job with the exclusions and debt arrangements! It’s not easy, that’s for sure so you’ve taken a really good step!
nThe sadness you feel, I get that. When I first stopped I got soooo mad! I was furious. I didn’t want to gamble and couldn’t understand why I felt that way until someone pointed out that I was in withdrawals! Yep! That was exactly it. Your sadness could be a lot of things…grief…it’s a loss, pure and simple. Regret….something that does us no favours, dwelling on what we have lost isn’t healthy, and it’s hard not to do it. But that money is never coming back and you need to accept it. The win will never be big enough…ever. We are addicted and the money is the means. Let it go and start over. I’m not sure how old you are but you come across as fairly young with your whole life in front of you. Grab it with both hands. The longer you don’t gamble the less you will think about it and your life will fill with other things, normal things.
nYou can have a happy life, you really can. It takes work, and life is not going to be all sunny post gambling, life is just that, life, and stuff happens to everyone. But gambling will not be fogging your mind, you will be able to think, this addiction consumes our every waking moment (and yep even In Our dreams sometimes) But you can manage this addiction. Do the work and you will be amazed. Take care, Kathryn x

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