[justletmerip]

Hey velvet and charles, really appreciate you checking up on me and for the thoughtful words.

Not surprisingly, I blew a good chunk of my pay yesterday when the addiction told me to stay away from pit games but try my luck in poker because “I can be patient, play good, better odds, etc”

Once I relapse, it’s like literally impossible to just stop and think about other things no matter what I do. Unless I quit for a good 6 months or longer, the “withdrawal” symptoms are still lingering just waiting to strike at any moment…

Day 1, AGAIN. Feeling really pointless and frustrated right now. Sometimes I wonder, do I even want help? What is the point of self excluding yourself from one establishment if you’re just going to find another?

But, there’s no excuses. I did what I did and it is in the past. Be better today than yesterday. I hope you guys commit to staying gamble-free.

[justletmerip]

Thank you both very much for taking the time to read and reply.

While it’s been a very difficult and depressing couple days for me, I’ve been able to slowly forgive myself while telling the addiction voice to **** off if it starts tempting me again.

Velvet, your post was very touching and gave me a different insight about this addiction. It’s really heartwarming to know there are others out there that care and want to better themselves through this struggle together. Again, thank you so much for the words of encouragement.

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