[jen3]

Thanks Vera, they did do an angiogram before and after the stress test. I am no good with medical terms. I just assumed it was part of the stress test. Like you, I usually self diagnose and avoid doctors and hospitals but never felt anything like this… but whatever it is, at least it’s not my heart.

[jen3]

I was having episodes of horrible chest pain. Mostly after physical excretion. Doc suggested a stress test and echocardiogram. I went in on Wednesday to have that done. Results were good. However, I still have the chest pain. It’s dull pain at all times and gets worse during and after exercise. I can not wait to see the financial damage from these tests. I wish I would not have had them but at least I have peace of mine that there is no issues with the “ticker” We will be in Mexico late March and the last thing I would want to happen is to drop over in foreign country. I have to laugh because I although I have not seen the bill yet I keep thinking“I did all that for nothing, what a waste of money”. How many times have I stayed up all night blowing hundred after hundred after hundred till I was in the thousands and broke for nothing??? At least this time I blew money on something sensible,,,, ruling out a heart condition. I guess it was the place to start since my dad has a history of heart trouble. If I had to diagnos myself now I would say chostochondritis or fibermyalgia… OR maybe its anxiety or withdrawal symptoms?? Which would be strange because I do not feel stressed and I do not really miss gambling.

[jen3]

Good God!!! That’s a lot of flipping snow. I thought we had it bad. I can pretty much guess where you are from. Stay safe. I will pray that everything is fine with the house.

[jen3]

Welcome back… I have been wondering where you went and how you were doing. As a matter of fact just this morning you crossed my mind while I was praying. I prayed for you and many others as I always do. Hope you are doing ok??

[jen3]

Hi Kin! Thanks for checking in on me. You seem to be doing well.??? I might of suggested this before, but I think you would enjoy the book Beyond Addictions by Jeff Rudd. (Google it)

[jen3]

Hi Kin! I have been doing ok. No gambling and not really struggling with any urges either. I thank God for that. Been dealing with some health issues. Long story. I wonder if it’s aftermath or years of stress that comes with gambling. (Road that roller coaster way too long) It’s strange because I do not feel stressed.. I should but I don’t. I guess I just know I can not change the past, I can just do my best to avoid relieving it and I trust Gods plan for me. I hope you are doing well. You and many others are always in my prayers!!

[jen3]

Way to go Liz’s daughter!!!! Very happy for you/her.

[jen3]

It sure has Vera! I still cringe when I think about all the lost money. But whats done is done. Just have to keep moving forward. Trying not to look back. I only look back when I am tempted. For example, one Day last week I went to meet with a client at his bar. I was early and saw some machines. I thought “those look fun”. Yeah I suppose they might be for some but not for me. I know I can not play unless I want to torcher myself. A little fun would turn into a lot of pain. It always has and always will. 

[jen3]

Praying for your daughter.

[jen3]

Thank you for sharing Kin! 

[jen3]

Hi Liz! Thanks for your post.  I am just catching up here. Been busy the last few days.  No more cold fronts. In the twenty’s today but looks like a little snow every day this week comming up. This has been the craziest winter I can remember. I can not wait till spring.  I hope you are doing good. I am making my way to your thread.  

[jen3]

Hi Jordancakes87! I feel you. This addiction sucks! I have struggled for many years. 20-25. I lost so much money, time, etc. To give you an idea, I stoped *****ing after 2 million and that was years ago so I can only imagine. I have relapsed more times than one can *****. However I have not gambled yet this year and I am bound and determined to keep it that way. I think your urges will lesson with time. I think at this point you should just take it a day at a time. Is there someone you can let control or keep your money till the urges lesson?? Is there anyone to talk to? Could your mom help?? Maybe GA or CR?? Me personally, I do not like GA but I do come here, I see a therapist who specializes in gambling addiction and I go to CR vs GA (Celebrate Recovery) you might want to google it. I am not sure what your beliefs are BUT the number one thing that has helped me the most is understanding that I am completely powerless over gambling and asking God to intervene. I can’t fight the addiction by myself anymore. I need him and he is giving me the power to do what I just can not do on my own. I hope you find what works for you. I will be thinking and praying for you.

[jen3]

I am glad you were not able to gamble. You could not right??? I know how much you love your son and just how frustrating it can be that our addicted brains would choose to zone out in our addiction and potentially hurt the ones we love most. It all sucks! Keep trying IDI. (Not to gamble but not to lol) Pray for God to take over. Thinking of and praying for you.

[jen3]

Today is the first day in several weeks that gambling crossed my mind.. it was just a thought but also a reminder of how in the past a thought would turn into action and the action into a nightmare. I guess I do not even want to entertain thoughts of gambling so giving it to God and going on with my day. 55 degree temp change. We went from -21 to mid 30s. Tomorrow and Monday upper 40s. I suppose some will be running around in shorts. Lol.

[jen3]

Just caught up on your thread Liz.. Happy for you and praying everything works out with your daughter/granddaughter. Enjoy dog sitting. 🙂

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