Thank you for your reply.
Its been hard to admit to someone or somewhere besides in my own mind, I’ve known for the last few months that was a big issue for me and couldn’t bring myself to say anything about it, as much as I wanted to. Until today, that is.
I definitely do want to stop and get my life and hopefully my relationship back to a good place. I will have my fiancee look at these forums when we are talking more and things are less raw.
Thank you for your reply. I’m going to do what I can to build my trust back with her if she will let me.