[icandothis]

(((Sherry))) Missing you. Hope things are going ok for you so far in 2014. Thinking of you, as I have been trying to develop some daily healthy habits this year. Follow through is not my strong suit (lol) Progress not perfection. As we always say, one day at a time, which applies to just about everything in our lives! I hope things are going better in your marriage. My husband and I have hit some bumps along the road lately, too! Anyway, no pressure, but I would love to hear from you. If not, that’s ok too. Just wanted to let you know you are not forgotten and as always sending good thoughts your way. Take care, (((Sherry)))

[icandothis]

Just wanted to check in. Missing my kids. Work was cancelled because of a snow day. This has been a brutal winter. I have been using this day to think about my recovery and try to process things. Not having a lot of success. I don’t really understand it myself. So many aspects to it all, and so many things that I am recovering from, and so many self-improvements I am trying to make. There does seem to be a subtle shift. I think it is the fact that I am beginning to accept myself for who I am and where I am at on this journey. I realize that I can’t possibly make all the changes I would like. And, why would I want to? Then I would be done! lol So I am trying to accept each day as it enfolds and move on and look to tomorrow as another day to begin again. I find that every day I can find something to beat myself up about and that has been what I have usually done in the past, whether I have gambled or not. I am working to change that pattern because it has been very destructive. I try to begin each day telling myself that things always have a way of working out for the best and that my life is changing for the better. It sounds corny, but when I begin to FEEL better, life just begins to get better. The trick is to feel better when I don’t think there is any reason to feel good. The truth is everyone can find something in their lives to feel good about or bad about. It just depends on which you want to focus upon. The good or the bad. I am trying to find something to feel good about, no matter what. Thank God for my cute, little white dog! lol
Many on this site have suffered a great deal, I am not in any way underestimating how cruel, difficult, and challenging life can be. My prayers go out to anyone who is suffering today. I guess today I am feeling more positive and I am enjoying the gift of a gamble-free day. I wish the same for all of you!

[icandothis]

Hi Wayne, I am sorry to read that you gave in. But, I wanted you to know that you helped me not to gamble yesterday. I was thinking that I wanted to go gambling and that I probably would follow through on that thought. I went on the computer in the morning. My fingers just kind of automatically type in Gambling Therapy. I read your post and could tell how much you were struggling not to gamble. I felt ashamed of myself because I wasn’t really struggling, and I was simply going to make the decision to gamble. You also made me think about my first days on GT and how each day was such a struggle not to gamble. After my first post, I gambled again after only one day. I did come back, like you, and posted. By the way, it takes courage to do so…so you should congratulate yourself for that. Someone told me, I think it was Cat, that any gamble-free day was a good one. You had one gamble-free day, and you should congratulate yourself for that too! Even if it is only one hour. Recovery is a process, a journey. Unique to each individual. With your first post, you began this journey. Do not give up, giving up gambling. You can do this! We are here for you and we will never, ever judge you. You have many friends here. Help us reach out to you because we do care.

[icandothis]

Welcome to GT and to your journey of recovery. You are right when you say that you are not alone. You have a very supportive group of people right here. The key to feeling supported is to continue posting!

[icandothis]

Sounds like things are clicking into place for you, SJ! Good for you!

[icandothis]

Hi P, Just wanted to thank you for your posts. Your name…Journey of Change…reminds me that it is a process and that it is indeed a journey of change. I don’t think I fit the description of how many think recovery should look like. But you remind me that it is a journey of change, and that is what I will continue to strive for…changing my life for the better one step at a time! I can see that you are doing just that and it gives me hope.

[icandothis]

I just finished paying our bills electronically. Not a big savings, just postage, but I am kind of proud of being able to figure it out and then doing it. Our credit union made it very easy. My recovery is anything but perfect, but when I look at where I am, I have to see that some positive changes have been made. I also paid off one of our credit cards…one down and two to go!

[icandothis]

Hi all, I haven’t posted in a while, but I have been reading some posts. Lurking in the background. February I did gamble. Won, won and then lost. Grateful that I didn’t take money from our joint savings or checking though, and I still believe that 2014 is going to be a good year. I can’t believe how that gambling has stirred up the desire to continue to gamble. I think about it all the time. I haven’t gambled this week, and I hope that the urges will begin to lessen. I am working on staying positive and making positive changes in my life. Baby steps…like right now I am sipping on my morning green smoothy of spinach, romaine lettuce, celery, 1/2 pear…yum, yum! lol
My son and DIL leave for London tomorrow where they will be living for 2 years. They have been coming over for dinner quite a bit these last couple of weeks. We are trying to get our fill of them and they are getting their fill of my home cooking. My husband and I will miss them both like crazy!

[icandothis]

Glad you are posting again, Lorraine. I don’t have any advice. No magic words to make things better. But, how I wish I did. I hope you know that people here do care. We do understand how things can get so out of control and can go from bad to worse. But, we also know that rock bottom means you can begin again. I feel so terrible that you have not found support, especially after everything you have gone through. All the more reason to seek the support you can find on this site.

[icandothis]

Hi Lizbeth, Your world does seem a bit crazy right now! lol Hang in there. You are handling things very well and making good choices. I can relate to your mother issues. It’s amazing how we still deal with them even as we are old ourselves.

[icandothis]

So proud of both of you!!! Our strengths can overcome our weaknesses! You are both blessings to the world! I am going to watch the Olympics. Will say a prayer for both of you and also the recipient of the stem cells. Also, will be giving you both the “icandothis Olympic Gold Medal” for being all that you are and then together creating something even greater!!! God bless!

[icandothis]

I am reading, MONEY, A LOVE STORY…Untangle Your Financial Woes and Create the Life You Really Want. by Kate Northrup. I have read it through once, and now I am reading it again and working through the exercises. It really makes you look at your relationship with money. I thought I might share a quote that struck me and provide you with some food for thought.
“Money is simply a stand-in for what we value, and often it’s a stand-in for how much we value ourselves. Somebody who is barely getting by and spends his last two dollars on a winning lottery ticket is not hard-wired for abundance, and the sudden influx of money isn’t enough to re-do his wiring….Money flows to those who value themselves. Plain and simple…The most important asset you have in life is you, so why not bring out the big guns and just start there?”

[icandothis]

I did not gamble today, and I will not gamble tomorrow. I will get up in the morning and try to remember that this is the month of love. I will do everything I can to value myself, as I am learning to value my contributions to others. I will ask myself, “What contribution will I make if I choose to gamble?”

[icandothis]

P, I have enjoyed reading your posts so much, especially lately. I remember the closed threads, but you always came back. You never gave up hope (I remember the Hope threads fondly) I love how you are openly sharing your journey and helping others to not give up on themselves.
I do have to disagree with something you said on Lindamarie’s thread though. You said that you were not a great example. I think you are absolutely a great example! Everybody’s recovery journey is unique and let’s face it, complicated. There are no easy solutions. We all must keep plugging along. One baby step at a time. I look at your progress and feel pride for you and hope for me and for many others. Keep up the good fight because you are so worth it!
Just found this quote in my journal. “No matter what you do, there will always be something you are working on. Life isn’t about perfection. Life is about living.” ~ Kate Northrup

[icandothis]

Hi Linda Marie, Welcome. P, is right. The important thing is to never give up on yourself. You have made a good decision not to gamble today or tonight. These first days are the hardest. It’s Saturday night, which can also be difficult. Make other plans now! Go to a movie or rent one, call a friend, go out for dinner…anything, but make the plans ahead of time. I also think it’s better to have plans that involve someone else, as you will be more committed to keeping them. While you are at it, make plans for next weekend, too. Just take it one day at a time. Every day you choose not to gamble is a good day, and it will make you just a little bit stronger. The hard truth is that there will always be days when we are not strong enough to make the right choice, so make sure you have barriers in place. For me that includes planned activities and no access to money. Wishing you a happy gamble-free weekend! Keep us posted! We are here for you no matter what.

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