[icandothis]

(((Cat))) It was a rough week. Vacation. Not a very good one. I thought about posting about the why’s, but I decided to move on instead. I tend to believe I am the victim and feel put upon…which I use as an excuse to gamble. Yesterday, I went to the bank and paid back my losses. So grateful to be able to do that and I still have a bit in savings. Will focus on taking one day at a time.

[icandothis]

After wearing boots almost every day for the last 5 1/2 months, I wore sandals yesterday! Sorted through paperback books, and then delivered three boxes full to the Salvation Army.
Nice afternoon dinner with hubby! Ride in his sport’s convertible.
Watched Saving Mr. Banks. Bed by 10:00. Good night’s sleep.
Relaxing Sunday morning. Grateful for whatever gifts this day may have to give.

[icandothis]

Sending you love and support, as you have done many, many times. Take care of yourself!

[icandothis]

Sherry, Would like to hear how things are going. I think people don’t always realize how important their posts are here. I just wanted to thank you for posting about the building of your house. It was a time when I felt my life was falling apart. To read about something new being built gave me hope. If you are struggling now, Sherry, there is always hope. Sending prayers your way.

[icandothis]

Cruising, your story matters. Don’t stop posting, whatever is going on. This site is not about perfection. For me, it is about sharing our one common weakness and remembering, finding, discovering and creating our many strengths. We are all in this together. Hope to hear from you soon. So many people share their story and then leave. Don’t be one of them. Because what they don’t understand is that by just telling their story, healing and recovery begins. All they have to do is continue the journey. Looking forward to sharing your journey of recovery one baby step at a time.
PS Sometimes we take one baby step forward and three giant steps backwards…just saying, it happens. All we can do is keep trying.
Sending prayers your way.

[icandothis]

Cat, thank you for your supportive post. You are right. The mind is so powerful! Just for today, “I can’t gamble”…so I am going to focus on the things that “I can” do instead. My mind is clearer than yesterday. I have had this week off, so today will be a day to regroup and get ready for next week. Also, to ask what changes can I make.

[icandothis]

Day 1. So many thoughts. So little I am able to articulate right now.
I think I need to change my name from “I can” to “I can’t”. It isn’t because right now I don’t feel like I can do this, even though that is how I feel, but I think it is finally sinking in to my thick skull that I CAN’T gamble. Ever! …and even now, with all the pain…I still hate the fact that I can’t gamble. But, at least for today, I accept it. Right now, I am “recovering” from last night and morning…it was an all-nighter. I want to stop “recovering” and be “in” recovery. Once and for all…all in!

[icandothis]

Liz, I can relate to the comment your mother made. We bought my parent’s cottage/house to help them out financially. Shortly afterward, the housing market skyrocketed, especially lakefront property. My mom asked me how it felt to be millionaires. It was then that I realized that she resented the fact that we owned her house, and she wasn’t grateful at all that we were trying to help them out. First of all, we weren’t millionaires and secondly, we all know what happened to the housing market shortly after that! lol things went south for us, too. My husband lost his job, and we continued to make payments on their house, even though we couldn’t afford it. I know I’ve shared this story before. The point I wanted to make is that after I came to this realization about my mom, our relationship changed. I used to tell her about our trips and the good things that were happening in our lives. I kind of wondered if she was happy for me, and I didn’t want to rub in the fact that things were going well for us. I honestly thought she was jealous of me, so I kept the good things to myself. She should have been happy for me. Things have really changed for my husband and I. But, no matter what happens in our lives, I want my children to be happy. I will cry with them if they are sad. But, I want the very best that life has to offer them. I want them to tell me all about all the good stuff, and I will celebrate it all right along with them, no matter what is going on in my own life. I realize now that I felt guilty that my mother wasn’t happy. I also realize now that it wasn’t my issue; it was hers. I also realize that I can be happy no matter what. The decision is mine. You deserve all the good stuff, Liz. Don’t feel guilty about the good stuff! Your mother should want that for you, too!

[icandothis]

OMG, I am so sorry to hear that, Carole! Lots and lots of stress for the both of you. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

[icandothis]

Hi Cat, Just wanted to thank you for all your support. I would not be where I am in recovery…which is a better place than I was 2 years ago if it weren’t for GT and people like you.

[icandothis]

P, you are so sweet. I am ok, but I am just really embarrassed and ashamed. I know what I need to work on. I don’t think I will be posting for awhile. Take care, p. Thank you for all your support.

[icandothis]

xxoo

[icandothis]

Hi Cat, Just wanted to say hi. I hope you are feeling more positive. I was feeling so positive yesterday. Now, today, I am feeling low and unmotivated. My feelings can change so quickly. We had a huge snow storm yesterday, but today it is bright and sunny. Really, quite beautiful. For WINTER that is! lol Have a great day, Cat!

[icandothis]

Hope you are doing ok, P.

[icandothis]

Thinking of you today, ((Liz)) I know your husband is very proud of you. Hang on to all those great memories!

[Author]

Posts