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Well done – such a relief !
I love courses but not the coursework !
Relax and enjoy the evening Sherrie !
Xx

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Hi Monica
I really don’t have any wisdom to offer .
I have two sisters and we are close – I would find it really hard to deny either of them anything – having said that they have never asked (well my little sister needed help to get out of a situation in her early twenties ). I got a loan and she paid it off .
I would never ask them either – so maybe it is a respect thing.

No I would never ask them because the only reason I would need to borrow would he due to gambling – and I probably would only borrow from another person who gambles at this stage because they know the risks. . Having said that I have lent money to friends several times.

I agree with Vera – if u can’t afford a car – u can’t expect someone else to pay for it . I know that if my car gives up in the next while I willbe using public transport – that’s just where I am at in life .

I feel there is something else going on with your sister – a little like there was something else going on with us . Usually u get a quote and that’s it – why would the price go up? Perhaps someone else is spending her money? If she works can she be that stuck for £150- surely she can access a loan or overdraft ?

Well done on doing the right thing for you !

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Thank you Kin.
I watched the video and thought it was excellent .
You know I have urges all the time but today each time they came I said “I used to Gamble but through the grace of God gambling interests me no more “ and yes it takes the urges away .
Thank you for sharing your wisdom .

I have just spent two hours washing and grooming the dog . Her tail was very matted and took an hour ! I feel a sense of satisfaction now it’s complete .
Today I went shopping and bought lots of really good food for the week – beef joint for pot roast , chicken fillets for curry , meat and veg for stew . Just need to get some good fish and it’llnea pretty good week .
I have so much to do before morn – not sure why I only feel motivated at night.

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Hi Sherrie
Glad to hear you are feeling better – your poor hubby – tooth ache is so awful.
You will get it done Sherrie .
350 words and hour and then a bit of time to tidy up and do references !
Thinking of you
Xx

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Hi Kin

God can remove all illnesses and afflictions – He is all powerful and I totally believe in the power of His healing .
There have been many testimonies of people addicted to drugs and living on the streets having theirs lives totally transformed by the power of God .

As you probably know I am not one for labels but I like how you have put it Kin.
There is little point in us professing our faith in God and then not trusting Him to do what we profess he can do.

Through the power of God may we all no longer have an addciton to gambling .
I feel your message is God inspired .
Too many people tell us this is for life – why should any illness be for life – especially now as we have a greater understanding of brain plasticity .
I am going to say often
“I was a gambler …With God’s grace, I am no longer ! Amen “

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Thank you Monica
Today I have decided to start a healthier eating routine . My mantra will be take the body and the mind will follow . I feel full of energy – the bright Spring sunshine seems to lift my whole body – perhaps next autumn I will invest in some of those “daylight “ lamps instead of gambling all my spare cash .

I think I have got myself out of yet another financial disaster – I will know for definite on Tuesday .
This one is more serious than usual – I really don’t know what will happen if things don’t work out .
I could be reaching rock bottom instantly. I feel mostly confident things will be ok … but then I can’t be sure. I am fine right now but an unfavourable outcome could push me over the edge . So stupid to end up in this situation! (Again)

I guess if I read back my posts over the past decade nothing much has changed – except despite the consistent short term crises I am in a much better financial situation overall, because I have set up direct debits to make sure everything is paid the moment my wages hit my account.

Not much else to say – got a lot of cleaning to do – A LOT
Sold something small on eBay – I think I will list lots of things just in case my “solution” doesn’t come through . What a way to live…

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Well done Jezi on your gamble free time – two weeks is a great achievement .
Yes Netflix finds it hard to keep up to me too- I hve started watching some of the ‘foreign’ series with subtitles – I love Justice for example .

Keep strong xx

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Thanks for sharing this -gaming site would Definitely be a much better option than gambling – although I immediately am thinking I could win some money at it !

It is good you stopped so early – As you have probably read – gambling is a progressive illness – so only gets worse.
Keep strong xx

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Jezi ,
About your friend – this is totally huge and consuming in our lives – but remember it is only a part of your friends life- and at that’s part of the friendship she has with you .
Try not to overthink it- she probably cares but has given it much less thought than you think .

I got numbers when I went to GA but I couldn’t rem who was who and I had no idea who I was texting. Lol!
Netflix has been my fix but it is just as addictive as anything else

Xx

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Sherrie I have just been catching up on your thread . It appears that your tearfulness has coincided with you coming off for meds . Should u have come off without medical advice ? Perhaps you need to wean yourself off slowly .

I was brought up catholic too and I one of the most powerful things I have learned about God is that I don’t need candles , his mother, saints or anyone else to speak to God for me- I have discovered that he is always there , walking beside me through life – and I can turn to Him any time . He will listen and he will wrap you in his love . So please don’t worry about the candle going out .

God has you in the palm of his hand!

Just ask of him and you will receive . I have decided that husbands are strange beings – they drive us crazy and yet we are kinda fold of them lol.

If he doesn’t trust you that’s his issue- if your life had been perfect you would not have sought solace in gambling.

This is why I will never discuss my gambling with my husband – it will just be another stick to beat me with.

You deserve a husband who says “you made a mistake Sherie – let’s work it out together – you have always been there for me , now let me be there for you”.

If not what is the point of being married ?

Just my thoughts – keep talking Sherrie , keep making the right choices for you .

You deserve respect , kindness and to be loved no matter what mistakes you make in life. Xx

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Monica Thanks for such a great post. I think you exactly hit the nail on the head !

In my last post when I talked about being likeable I was going to write about my looks fading ( they are faded)! I thought it sounded too conceited so I deleted it but here goes anyway .

My looks have carried me through such a lot of situations -I had a pretty face which wasn’t so pretty that I seemed unapproachable – I could charm interview panels, barmen, policemen ( I have smiled my  way out of so many speeding offences ) etc.

I used to love looking at myself in photos ( I was very photogenic and looked better in photos than real life,) I now look horrendous in photos – my teeth hve shifted and are no longer straight- a few of my bottom teeth seem to have stained – my weight has ballooned , – I have broken veins on my face – the wrinkles I don’t mind – I quite like them to be honest . It’s the new bulgy bits I hate and the new sunken bits.

I don’t mind getting older – what I hate is that I am an ugly older person .

When I think about the big win – it is always followed by thoughts of Botox, cosmetic dentistry , liposuction etc.

So there I am as shallow as I am vain! I want to look nice more than I want to really change of my character faults !

On the positive side – I no longer speed- I don’t want to pay fines !

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Thank you Steev, Lizbeth,Monica and Jezi

I am really touched by your supportive posts.

Jezi I think you are right – respecting our bodies will help us to think clearer- “take the body and the mind will follow “.

Steev, I guess maybe I am in pain – I’m not sure where that pain is coming from- or If it even exists – I guess a lot of time I don’t feel likeable and I over compensate by being “bigger than life”. I lack something – I’m Not sure what it is – but I lack it .

Monica I like the idea of working on ourselves, even if no one notices . I think I am going to work On being “quieter” and less jolly . I laugh and joke my way though life and then I come home and gamble- maybe I need to be more real – maybe I need to trust others just a little . There will always be opinionated people who have to have their say even if it involves putting others down. I wasn’t always the joker – I think it’s a way of coping .

Thank you Lizbeth – I think GA is so not for me – and the more people quote bits of GA at me the more I feel it’s the last programme in the world I would want to do . I personally find the cliches outdated , I find myself amazed when people quote them like they are facts and the relapse rate is so high for GA , I wonder why they try force it onto others.

I do think however that the SMART programme might suit me – it uses modern language and concepts (like CBT) , is clear that labelling should be avoided and it seems less about criticising (under the guise of challenging !!!) and more about encouragement . I try not to criticise others and i definitely do not respond well to it . I am going to check out SMART again. When I looked into it some years ago my phone was blocked and I didn’t have the technology to access it . I also wasnt really ready for any programme .

That’s about it – each of your comments really made me think. It feels like this post has lifted a weight from inside me. Much appreciated xx

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Hi Lizbeht
Thank you for our supportive comment on my thread – I needed it.
I will be praying for your daughter – it sounds like she only just missed passing the test . It is fantastic that she is so motivated to do well.
I feel you are making a wiSe decision about getting. Party tie help with your granddaughter. It is also a joy to read that your son is doing so well. You have raised good children and are such a positive grandmother in your grandchildren’s life.

I am so glad to read of your determination to stay gamblefree- you work so hard Lizbeth – you deserve to reap the rewards of your labour.
Xx

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Jezi
I find your post about Ga so helpful.
That’s what t was like for me – in my meeting your name was called and despite the first week saying I wasn’t comfortable speaking , I felt forced to speak.
It was embarrassing , I felt silly , I could hear my voice ringing in my ears and I knew at that moment I wouldn’t be back .

It makes me feel so much better when you describe your experience – failing at GA stung – I had hoped to find help, support and maybe even friendship – instead I found a room full of so many men and felt like an imposter among them !

Until your post however, I never realised that I have never spoken out loud about my addiction before . Perhaps that was my difficulty- perhaps if they had let me move at my own pace rather than insist on what had worked for them I might still be attending .
I hope your at next meeting you feel more comfortable speaking and a big well done on going! Major respect to you !

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Hi Steev
So glad u now have your own thread !
Hope the move is going well.
Maybe see you in group later
Xx

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