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Monica ,
It sounds like you are lacking nourishment –
It is hard to feel happy when the blood sugar is low and our bodies are craving vitamins and minerals .
I’m wondering if you could buy some cheap supplements .
I hope to see you in a group later – I called in on the twelve o’ clock one last night but it was empty .
Hate to think of you feeling so unhappy .
Xx

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Thank you Lizbeth And Laura ,
Lizbeth I remember you saying you had a similar experience –

it’s a shame because if the forums were monitored correctly a staff member could simply press delete on an unacceptable post – I know they certainly exercise this option in the f and f forum- it seems like we are the poor relation on this forum. It makes me feel that we are perceived as inferior perhaps due to our addiction – which again is off- putting when it come to posting honestly.

So today I may or may not gamble – that is MY CHOICE.
I will continue with my own steps – toxic people have no place in my life -whether that is “friends” on their own agenda , “support” which makes me feel unheard ,
“Support ” which is stuck on replay of methods which have never worked for me, Colleagues who need me to carry them, managers who would have me carry the team , family who don’t understand boundaries in their words and actions .
Today I choose support which is mutual and respectful – you know who you are .
Today I choose colleagues who work hard
Today I choose friends who choose mutual friendship
Today I choose family who are “adult” in their relationships .
Today I choose to be careful about what I reveal in my thread .
Today I choose support which actually supports me – whether that is in removing hurtful posts , encouraging rather than criticising and judging with the need for the last word.

Today I choose me !

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Bok Lizbeth, Žao mi je što čujem o vašoj gripi- čini se da se gripa danas pogoršava. Nadam se da ćete se sutra osjećati puno bolje i volim vaš pozitivan način na koji pristupate životu

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Hi Lizbeth,
Sorry to hear about your flu- it seems flus are getting so much worse nowadays.
Hope you feel lots better tomorrow and I love ur positive way you are approaching life

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gamble free day

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Hi Monica
What’s happening your world today ?

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Yeah it was before I was deeply hurt by people on this site – hard to forget , but I will try to get back to the pre-vicious attack days !

Steps to avoid next bet-
Step 1 – avoid toxic people- then no need for escape gambling.

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Thank you both, Monica and Laura –
Yes Laura I will start a new thread .
Xx

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Hi Monica ,
I hope the sun is shining in your world today .
I enjoyed our chat last night but of course it was too short .
Did u have Sunday dinner?

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You are never offensive Laura – you are only kind , supportive and helpful. I too have those self doubts but as I have gotten older I find I don’t care as much about what people think!

You do have great insight (as Monica says below ) and sometimes when I read your posts I am blown away by the angle you see things from.
I once did an online course called mood gym. It was free and by the Australian health service – it made me see the world completely differently.- for example – if someone gives me a dirty look I will now instead of thinking “omg, what did I do?” -I will think I must catch up with them later – looks like they are having a bad day ! I would highly recommend this course although now I have to pay for it . It kinda changed how I perceive things !

Stay strong Laura – the pain and the lack of mobility probably are giving you time to over think things – you are a super person and a great support to everyone one here!

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Lizbeth, kad se aktivno kockam, pomislim – nisam siguran zašto – jer za mene to nije nešto što sam ikada smatrao mogućnošću. Mislim da je to nešto što kockanje pokreće u našem mozgu. Zabranili ste ulazak u taj kasino – dobro razmislite – postoji li neki drugi način na koji se možete kockati ako ste ostavili neka vrata? Čvrsto ga zatvorite kao što Geordie kaže – onemogućite kockanje, a zatim započnite četverogodišnji plan otplate – nikad ne znate što će vam život poslati. Sve dok ste zadovoljni kompromisnom Lizbeth- to je sve što je važno. Obitelji su teške i svi moramo napraviti kompromis, pretpostavljam u obiteljskim trenucima -na primjer, ja na svojoj božićnoj večeri kuham ono što smatram dva junk foodom jer su oni oduvijek bili dio Božića za moje tetovaže?! ??? Lol, mislim da je udomljavanje drugog djeteta odlična ideja ili kako bi bilo da umjesto da ih provedeš cijeli dan uzmeš dvoje za poslije škole? – bit će stariji, zahtijevat će manje posla i pokupit ćete ih kad škola završi. Tko zna da bi se to moglo razviti u posao koji bi vaše kćeri mogle voditi s vama? U životu ima toliko mogućnosti – ponekad ih samo trebamo zgrabiti. Bit ćeš dobro Lizbeth – imaš glavu na glavi – donosite dobre odluke!

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Lizbeth , when I am actively gambling I get those thoughts – I am not sure why – because for me it’s not something I ever considered as a possibility . I think maybe it’s something gambling triggers in our brains .

You have barred from that casino – think carefully – is there any other avenue to gamble your have left over- any door ? Close it tightly like Geordie says – make it impossible to gamble and then start your four year repayment plan- you never know what life will send your way .

So long as you are happy with the compromise Lizbeth- that’s all that’s important .
Families are difficult and we all have to compromise I guess at family times -for example I am cooking what I consider two junk food items at my Xmas dinner because they have always been part of Xmas for my inlaws ?!??? Lol
I think taking in another child is a superb idea or how about instead of having them the whole day you maybe take two for after school? – they will be older , require less work and u pick them up when school ends. Who knows this could develop into a business your daughters could run with you?

There are so many opportunities in life – sometimes we just need to grab them.
You will be ok Lizbeth – u have your head screwed on – u make good decisions!

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Thank you P, Laura and Monica .

I’m back.
I have realised something – actually while reading Lizbeth’s thread- I accept less than acceptable behaviour from others – this has spilled over into my support .

I have a friend who bullies me into drinking with her – sounds mad but I just recognised a pattern while reading Lizbeth’s Thread – the horrible texts , the emotional blackmail , the huffing behaviours- this year I have so far had an
alcohol free party season and it has been the best I remember -because I am learning to assert myself .
I also have had no posts on my thread which have left me feeling useless , demotivated and deflated.
Being assertive is hard for me – but I am seeing the peace it brings to my life .
I guess it is about valuing ourselves enough to allow people to treat us how we deserve to be treated and not allowing others to treat us in a manner we find unacceptable

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Bok Liz, tvojoj će kćeri trebati period da se prilagodi činjenici da ne može koristiti svog sina kao pijuna, ali ona će tamo stići. Bravo što ste se držali svojih božićnih planova. Također samozabrana iz kasina velika je stvar za napraviti – dobro obavljeno – koju ćete slobodu dobiti. Unatoč bilo kakvim greškama koje ste možda imali, žena ste na oporavku – promjene u vama, u načinu na koji se ponašate prema sebi i kako dopuštate drugima da se ponašaju prema vama su izvanredne. Nastavi raditi na tom oporavku Liz

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Hi Liz ,
It will take your daughter a period of re- adjustment to the fact she cannot use her son like a pawn, but she will get there .
Well done on sticking to your Christmas plans .
Also self banning from the casino is such a huge thing to do – well done – what freedom this will give you.
Despite any slips you may have had you are a woman in recovery – the changes in you, in how you treat yourself and how you allow others to treat you are remarkable .
Keep working that recovery Liz

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