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What a great talent for a partner to have!
Can he do fake tan? Lol

Yes it does sound like you two are stuck in a rut –
It’s time to clear that space and make room for new opportunities to enter your life .
You deserve the best always – you deserve to be supported when u feel vulnerable .

I get the impression Pete has his own issues – not your problem !

I can’t wait for him to move out ! I sense it will be like throwing off a heavy rug sack full of stones which U have carried for far too long !

Ah there is so much life left to live !

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Hi cubsfan
What an honest post .
I admire your honesty to your wife and your commitment to beating this horrible addiction.
You have closed the doors forever on those casinos and that is a great move forward.
I look forward to reading about how your life improves.

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Hi Zed,
Yes that sounds familiar .
The waking in the middle of the night panic striken but gambling anyway .
The suicidal thoughts
The. Feeling I just can’t stop

I would advise that u put a gambling blocker on your phone or laptop of both. Then if u wake up and u want to bet u can’t ! I have betfilter for iPhone- a bit tricky to set up but gives me such freedom .

Talk to your creditors and get a sensible repayment plan .

Join GA or attend groups here or best of all do both .

Hats my advice using the information you have given .
I have struggled for years with this addiction so I know how hard it is to stop- and it’s nearly impossible without support .
Well done on seeking help .
Please know you can stop .
Keep posting

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Wow – u gotta hand it to English men – cutting , filing and varnishing your nails – my Irish husband Would think that my nails grow with bright red polish on th! Lol
I am well impressed!

I actually suspect the reward was more like reality kicking in that he is losing you than anything to do with housework.

Going to cut this short to nip into group – will u be there ?

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All ok Micky ?

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Ring your bank and speak to them Erenachi
Tell them what happened and how you are going to wort this out .
I find Its good to go to them before they go to you – the will have dealt with this before and they will come up with a sensible repayment plan .
It will be easier to tell your wife of you when a financial recovery plan in place – you earn good wages – you can sort this .
There is little in life that cannot be sorted by talking Eranachi .

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Hey Sherrie .
I am fortunate in my situation in that I am still working – the usual – not much to show for it and debt – but still working and will hopefully for another decade ( please God ).

However in the past I went for debt advice and was told my only option was bankruptcy – I have some idea of what it is like to feel that your back is against the wall and you just don’t know where to go – the letters and Phone calls are incessant and the stress of unbearable . Somehow I have come back from the brink .

I coped (just about ) with that awful stress but I didn’t have to deal with my partner being so ill- you have so many huge burdens in your life right now .
It is so hard to stop gambling at the best of times – when you have the worry of such an ill family member I can imagine gambling gives you a little bit of an escape from it . It really must be a terribly painful time for you .

Sherrie , is there anyone you can reach out to — could you speak to a counsellor or friend ? I feel you are carrying too much for one person to cope with .

Day one is ok you know – I have had years of them.
No one is going to judge you here because it’s the one place where not one of us have the right to judge – we all know what day one feels like and it is usually not the nicest feeling !

I know you must be feeling very low right now , so forgive me if I sound preachy – I have got myself in quite a lot of bother on the forums so please trust me when I say my intentions are good even if my words come across clumsily .

Keep strong Sherrie .

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Thank you for posting on my thread DCH. And thank you for your lovely comment.
You are doing so well and it sounds like you are getting stronger and stronger in recovery.
I am pleased to say I have not gambled this year and it is now three weeks since I last gambled .
You see what we can all do when we support each other .
Well done !

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Hi Monica,
Yes Bettie is a wonderful person also – I miss her regular posts although as with many people I found I read more than I replied -I find it hard to write when I’m gaming – it somehow feels like I am deceiving people .

What a family history – Monica -what hardship and what pain- What loss . I cannot think of any words which would convey the absolute horror and pain which your father suffered. I am sure this impacted his whole life and his whole family . I am not eloquent enough to really comment on this one but can say his story has touched me deeply .

Monica – I was the first in my family it graduate too – maybe ever ! I know for people who have not had opportunity it brings great pleasure when their children succeed in this way .

I have written before – sometimes when we look back we see how gambling has ruined our lives and we forget how many great things we have done .

That same Monica is still there – always remember that .

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Thank you Semaj for sharing .
I have started watching the video link and it is excellent – I have read quite a bit about this man.

You have rightly observed that once we cross the line into gambling addiction we always end up losing – even if takes a while.
The only solution for us is to stop gambling completely .
I wish you well on this journey and hope you find this site to be a supportive part of your recovery.

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Hi jay2k
Jappy has given you some excellent information so I will just welcome you to the site and say well done for taking action now to stop his horrible illness from destroying your life – well done !

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Hi Monica ,
I have posted on your thread but I will repeat some of it here . Your post really hit home for me – I am fortunate to have my job, but if it were to go for whatever reason, I would be in a very bad position . I would be homeless and completely broke.
It is a sobering thought.

I totally agree – there is no such thing as controlled gambling for me although when I am in action I truly believe I can control it – despite every single time failing to – what is that definition of madness again? Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result ..

I have made it to week 3.
I am feeling very supported on here and that has helped I am sure . I have learned also from the chats in group that maybe all those times when I was in a feeble recovery and reminding people who knew only too well about barriers etc , it may not have been helpful to them- but rather annoying .

I guess we all mostly try to help each other – just sometimes out motives do not come across well in print .
My thread feels like a safe space now and for that I am grateful. I am focusing on my continued recovery and I really feel I can do it this time (please do not remind me how often I have said that over the past 8 years). I feel I have lost some friends here in the fall out and it hurts- but it is what it is is . There are many people who refused to take sides (mine included ) and that has increased my respect for them- I like fairness – I always have !

A sincere thank you to the staff of GT (Charles , Monique and Harry ) for their non- judgemental but consistent encouragement . I’m not sure I could exercise the same patience but please know that there have been the most incredible improvements in my life – stopping hasn’t been a sudden thing for me but I have bounced back very quickly from relapses, with your support , therefore limiting the damage .

Life is generally quite good – I still haven’t got the kitchen I have been dreaming of , for a decade and a half , but today I can go out for brUnch , afford nice activities with my son and have a generally nice day.

Can’t complain !

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Monica , I so agree with Lizbeth.
Gaining a masters degree is difficult at any time but when you are also fighting an illness like cancer , it is remarkable.
What a survivor you are and what resilience you have.
These same qualities will turn your life around and get you to where you want to be.

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Hi Little Lady
It is horrible when we are hit with this addiction- when we realise we cannot stop- when we finally start to see that the big win to cover the debts isn’t coming – and even if it does come we end up gambling it.
However , there are many people on here who stop gambling and have very prosperous lives-debts can be paid off slowly while allowing funds for a good life.

Do you know about barriers little lady – things which make it difficult to gamble- like gambling blockers on your internet devices , maybe get someone else to look after your money, and cutting up and cancelling all cards you have used to gamble.
You have taken the first step to stopping. Well done and I hope to get to know you better on this site

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How are things going Mav?

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