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Hi Nick ,
I love this post and I know this will really appeal to Monica and Laura when they get back .
I haven’t followed the links yet – I am saving them for a treat when I have finished posting .
I have just written something on my own thread which fits in with this
.i have written how I still have strong urges a lot of the time but how my determination is even stronger because I have some goals .

I love your positivity . We are still here and we can build whatever life we choose for our future .
Thank you for reminding me !

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Day 23 over -urges still there but I haven’t gambled.
I am realising just how much the gambling fantasy has helped me to escape dealing with life .

When little things go wrong , when I feel overwhelmed , when I feel belittled – my immediate thoughts are of this huge win which will instantly stop all this discomfort in my life .

That’s perhaps why judgmental posts were so detrimental to my recovery – this site is my main support – whether it is intended to be or not. I don’t mean posts which talk about barriers and the negative outcomes of gambling- I mean posts which judge me and my many shortcomings in various areas of my life which I was brave/ stupid enough to post about .

I guess gambling has helped me to escape dealing with stuff and now without that escape I have no choice but face up to it.

So the urges continue but strangely the determination not to gamble grows stronger too . I am starting to see the good life which lies in front of me. I am getting head space to think about what I really want.

I am doing ok .

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I posted you earlier and just noticed it has not appeared on your thread.

I am so pleased you are enjoying your trip Laura . I wanna be you right now lol.
I hope the sunshine is therapeutic – you so deserve this treat .
Xx

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Thank you Laura for you post .
It is so god to hear from you .
How wonderful to lie on the beach in Florida !

It is day 23 for me – I feel so tired and don’t want to go to work- this so becoming a recurring theme – unfortunately I haven’t left myself with much choice .
So work it is .

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You are so right Monica – I am having a yuk day – not sure why- just feel sad for no particular reason – I guess it’s some kind of withdrawal .
I just want to take a week off and stay in bed with a hot water bottle …
Or I guess I could get up and move …

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Hi Monica ,
I hope you get good food while you are away .

I don’t suppose you could wash the “stuff” off the salad?

I guess you will be having an early night so if I don’t see you in group later – safe trip and hope it’s a really positive experience for you .xx

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Hi Nick
Is it an iphone ?
By the time I got everything closed down on my phone with betfilter it was hardly worth having an iPhone – however the bag of top quality groceries I am about to lift out of my car more than compensate .
Let me know and I will talk u through my experience .

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U know Lizbeth I am having a really lonely day and wishing I could back and change so many choices I have made –
But your post has lifted me !xx

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Yahoo ! Well done Sherrie !

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I have to agree Lizbeth – the support on here has been incredible -it has certainly saved my sanity over the years . I too feel alone in recovery so the kind people on here are incredibly important for me .

I think Epsom salts baths are incredible if you have aches and pains so maybe buy in a stock so you are ready to relieve those back to work aches . Old fashioned but I swear by them !

You really are doing so well Lizbeth – I continue to be blown away by your motivation and energy .

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Good morning Monica
Great chat last night and it seemed you got a lot of helpful advice from TTA.
Thank you for your post on my thread – it is a sharp reminder of what gambling really is .

I hope you are feeling prepared for your trip and looking forward to it . Today will be a busy day and I hope you can manage to get some sleep before your early start
Xx

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Yes Tta ,
When stepchange advised me To go bankrupt I really felt it was the end of my world . I ignored their advice as I knew I was still earning and I knew the advice came so quickly that they must be following a formula rather than looking at individual cases.
I am glad I didn’t have To go bankrupt but even the thought of it was so daunting that I feel this thread will be invaluable .

Thank you for starting it and thank you for sharing in chat

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Hi Laura ,
How is the trip going ?
Hope you are enjoying the heat .

I notice you say you have family with you everywhere and they are the best barrier .
It makes me
Think about my situation and how being with family is a huge trigger for me because they always want me to go to the casino with them. Its so good that you can spend time with family without that worry .
keep in touch !

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Thank you Raynor and Monica,

I have made it through the night and I know I won’t gamble .raynor you are so right – our brains do trick us – or the addicted part does .
Monica what a reminder of what gambling really is – years of struggle and pain for a short lived and questionable pleasure .

Yes today I am so happy I squashed those urges.
Today I can face the day without regret and guilt .

Week 4 – not bad !
Thank you everyone for tyour support both on the forums and in chat .

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Today I went grocery shopping – I didn’t go to my usual bargain supermarket and check for reduced food .
Today I bought expensive food – and today I got the real taste of delicious food – it was so good – I cannot believe the difference .

Today I bought good food because I am never depriving myself or my family again. Today I bought good food because I have the money I didn’t gamble .

Today I also have had crazy urges .
The are bouncing around my head like a ping pong ball – From Website to casino to lottery – from win to riches to how generous I can be.
The impatience is starting again – a new kitchen later this year or a new kitchen now – I could win the money – my brain has tricked me too often – today I will wait!
Today I have been burned often enough to know what the outcome will be .
So why do the urges keep coming ?

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