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Hi Laura ,
It sounds like you are doing the right thing for your post-op recovery – sleep is healing and it sounds like those meds are making sure you are getting enough.

Booking a trip is so much healthier that giving our cash to some casino – a great plan.

Look forward to when your health is fully restored and we can have our chats in the groups .

Get well soon xx

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Well done Nick.

A question based on my own experience (but I seem to have very poor willpower) do you think it might be worth getting bet filter on your phone before payday ? You download betfilter as your main browser – in all honesty it’s not as good as other browsers – you then delete every app that can access the internet – would you believe I got caught out by the Pinterest app?- you also delete your App Store – then when all this is done you get someone to set the parental restrictions so you cannot access again.
The down side is you can no longer download new apps (I wanted the weight watchers app !).
The upside is you cannot gamble on your phone so if you do have a moment of weakness it remains just a moment of weakness and not a relapse .

It has certainly saved me – although you may not need it.
For me I cut up pieces of paper and selected numbers at random and then dumped them so I guess my phone is pretty much locked forever !

You are doing so well Nick. It will be great to get that Money locked away and your house will become a reality . Stay strong Nick !

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Hi Lizbeth ,that sounds like a really lovely day . I am considering moving closer to my family at the moment . I’m not sure if it’s viable financially but I would love to able to have days like that .

You sound happy . It just goes to show that your recent decisions were the right ones.

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Thank you for your post Micky
Day 43 – the start of week 7.

I have learned a lesson yesterday .
I think it demonstrates my increasing self esteem that I am no longer prepared to offer friendship, support or help when it is not mutual.

I have so many people in my life who would drop everything for me if I needed them to – why do I still waste my time on some people who only take ?
The take time, energy and happiness – life suckers.

On a positive note I have my long weekend away in three days.
I am doing this – and I realise that not having the wrong “support” in my life is just as important as having the right support.

Onwards and upwards!

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Well done Micky – sounds like you have a good day planned .
I am planning on going out to get away from the rugby , football and other boring sport which my husband watches obsessively lol!
Like how could he watch sport when interesting stuff like Housewives of Orange ****** or Dr Phil is on?
haha!

Have a great day – enjoy your rugby !

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Hi Nick,
I hope all is going well and house is becoming more of a reality every day .
Saving is so difficult – my elusive kitchen has suffered a set back – thank fully not to gambling – but bills always seem to pop up.
Keep posting – I like reading your thread .

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Had a long lie in today .
My flu needs its sleep and I do feel so much better !

I feel anxious because I feel overwhelmed – in truth by circumstances outside my control but which still impact greatly on me .

Today I can control only what I can control so today is all about house work and nice meals.

Interestingly , since I have started buying really good quality food I wake up and think about the lovely tasty meal I will be having rather than having chocolate with my morning coffee.

How little did I care about me to develop such appalling eating habits ?
I could spend £500 on a night ‘s gambling and then buy the cheapest cuts of meat! I don’t think I will ever eat a pork chop again.

My thinking about self care is totally warped but getting there.

I go away next weekend and I have decided to buy new Pyjamas for the trip .
Night wear has been old t shirts and horrible Xmas gifts for the last decade . Having nice nightwear is kinda a really big deal for me – no one will see it but I will know that I am worth it ! Anyone else understand what I mean?

Urges still strong – the lottery is there in my thoughts all the time -as much as slot machines ever were .

Onwards and upwards !

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Hi Monica ,

It was nice to meet your briefly in group last night .

It’s such a shame that the open chats are so inadequate now – in the past they were a really good support .

I hope you are feeling really positive today !
I cannot get your sister out of my mind- it seems like they have done their checks and are evicting those they can evict.
What a horrible society we live in – where the rich get richer …

Have a lovely day Monica and get out in that Spring sunshine !
(Our Spring is the Celtic calendar -Feb Mary April – did you know that ?)

Onwards and upwards Monica

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Lisbeth , that is such a lot of stress especially at a time of our lives which can be difficult for us women anyway.
I guess a lot stress can be reduced by money and hence we chase the big win.
You have taken steps to reduce that stress now so you can enjoy the time with your grandson.
I’m not sure how we can avoid stress in our lives and I think the kind of stress which we have when we are older has little to do with deadlines which can be helped by a few breathing exercises ! However we have both learned that the temporary escape we get from gambling only increases our stress.
I am writing this and all the time the “big win” is swirling around my head – this disease is horrible !

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So it’s past midnight which means I have completed week six.

I have not gambled this year.

It seemed impossible but with the right support it is very possible .

I think the fact hat I am counting days and weeks shows that I don’t find it easy.
Sometimes I feel anxious possibly because I have no escape now.
Interestingly I have lost some weight – I think this is because I am buying high quality food so I don’t have to eat lots of it to get nourishment so my body is not always craving something else .
Life is pretty good – I go abroad next weekend for a short break. I can just about afford it .

I miss the regulars like Laura and Kathryn and send them both hugs and best wishes .

Nite all.

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Well done Johnny
Just missed u in chat
U are right though – the chats are very difficult to use now and so short no one really gets to say much

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Hi Monica,
Your post has touched something deep inside me . I feel angry, frustrated and sad to think your sister and her husband could be treated so horribly . The estate may be in trouble but it will be the “little people ” who pay the cost . It has stirred some deep emotions as it brings back the history of my own country and the appalling treatment at the hands of rich landlords – from evictions when crops failed and rent couldn’t be paid – to the Irish Holocaust when food was shipped out of the country under armed guard while millions of Irish died, and that perhaps was one of the least injustices that happened . Oh I hope your sister can save her home – surely there are laws which protect people – I am thinking there may be a clause under human rights where people who have lived in their homes for over thirty yeArs have the right to live out their days in peace .

I also feel a sense of hope for you. Bottom line if we can work we can have an ok life – I hope you get into suitable employment soon- I feel hope because you sound so positive and determined . Monica life is not good without money .
I am afraid you have converted me. I forget what Lidl looks like. But my thinking has changed . I love having nice food in the house and find I am running to those pricier shops for almost everything – and yet I am saving a lot of money because I no longer look in the fridge and then go and get an Unhealthy take away.
I hope to meet you in group soon. Sorry if my reply is really strong – your post did stir some deep rooted emotions .
Monica keep strong !

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Lizbeth
That’s great news . Being free from the awful stress means you can be available for emergencies like when your daughter needs your help with Baby.
Lizbeth , do you recognise your triggers and is there a strategy you can use when you feel triggered ?
I am asking because my slot machine addiction hardly calls to me at all recently but the urges to do the lottery are so strong – I don’t really know why .
The important thing is your bills are paid and you can get on with your life !

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Normal is good !
Normal means no stress, worry or gambling.
Keep strong !

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Hi Jennifer ,
Firstly , YOU CAN STOP!
Please read through Jappy’s very informative post and follow all his tips .
Make it impossible to gamble until the spell is broken .
I could not stop either but guess what – I’m stopped !
Well done on seeking support – pursue recovery with selfish determination .m- let nothing or no one stand in your way.
Get ur husband to mangage all the money and provide receipts for all you spend.

You can beat this and if you are really determined you will!

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