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Kin I feel you think very deeply and with great insight .
I have never found anything you have written to be garbage – in fact I always take something from your posts .

It sounds like you are procrasinating with your work right now – I am a champion procrastinator – perhaps there is something in the bible to help you with that .

Kin write whatever you feel like writing in any day – this is your thread and if it’s where you are at it is relevant .

Sometimes I write about shopping for makeup ! It might seem completely lightweight but having the money to go and buy it is very relevant to me and is much deeper than just the makeup – it is how I feel when I set off , the conversations with the staff at the makeup counter , the joy of having a nicely presented package , the free trials samples I come home wth . It contrasts starkly to the days when I used anyone’s rubbish make up they no longer wanted and was so glad to have anything to put on my face.

I love to read your thread – never apologise for it.
Now go and get those assignments done !
It might help if you post of your progress after each page ?

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Lizbeth

I am sorry to read you are feeling so anxious- gambling has taken all of us to a place we never thought we would be and it can be so hard to face the consequences of that .
I have taken on extra work which is helping enormously – it gives me a little breathing space but it also takes time I could be with my family . There is no easy solution to debt I guess – just patience and perseverance – but yes it does cause a lot of guilt, anxiety and regret.

I am rooting for you Lizbeth that you can make some arrangement with your creditor .

Keep strong my friend – look how far you have come .

Xx

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Hi Kin ,
Well done on sorting out that bill- I have recently been charged for things I didn’t understand but 02 were far less helpful . So I am paying for things I don’t have or use . I guess I just have to let it go .

Also well done in taking the time out when you were feeling angry – it’s nice that you were able to understand that your mum struggled with using the new fan – you seem to be thinking things through a lot nowadays and making som really good choices .

Triggers for me were always a sense of feeling put down – sometimes the triggers were even on this site but not recently. Maybe I just see through people a little more nowadays .

When we identify triggers we can deal with them- especially when we learn to control our impulsiveness , just like you did .

keep strong my friend – you are making great progress.

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It’s a little thing but another month has passed where I had nice things happening (like meals out ) and yet I didn’t run out of money. I feel inspired today reading Laura ‘a thread – when things are going well it is easy to forget how motivating A now and then post can be. It is easy to forget in the relentless cycle of urges and successes (and sometimes slips) that life can get so much better.

In recent months I find this forum extremely helpful and motivating – after almost a decade on here my brain must be starting to get it . I appreciate the helpful and uplifting posts so many take the time to write . I am just about to start month five – who would have thought i could do it ?

Today I am doing long neglected house work- today I am seeing a good future .
Today I am happy and I feel connected and supported thanks to the lovely people in my life including those on here .

.

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Hi Laura ,
Great post – I too have rekindled some old friendships and seem to have a lot of friends – I guess I was an ok person before gambling addiction took hold .
It is extra nice to have these friendships now that our kids are grown and we have time to enjoy our friends .
I also have created some distance with friends who dragged me down – why do people think we want their uninvited criticism? I don’t anymore and I won’t wait around for it anymore ! It certainly makes life a lot happier and easier when we don’t have to constantly defend ourselves.
I read your posts and think that is where I can be Laura – with just a little patience and a little wisdom.
Thank you for sharing – it is good to read about those who are making it
Xx

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Inspiring post Monica, and it seems to be happening for you .
Perhaps a bit of anxiety about starting the new job kept you awake ?
I hope you have a nice relaxing day .
Xx

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Hi Ciaran,I just checked 

betfilter is 25 for three months .

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Today is payday (i hope).
I am meeting friends later for a meal and my first thought was i need to get something new to wear.
It’s that impulsiveness that I have to fight against. I do this all the time and spend too much and still haven’t got decent clothes.
Today i will make do and when i go shopping I will buy things that are chosen carefully and that i can get lots of wear out of.
Taking the time to think – not jut about gambling but about all those small decisions in my life, especially those that involve money, will make a long term difference. It is a comfortable feeling to know that I now have access to money should an emergency arise. I need to focus on continuing ti build those savings but also I need to have extra left over in my regular account so I do not have to dip into those savings all the time.

So for today its a re-wear- I bet no-one even notices!

onwards and upwards

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Hi Ciaran,
I use betfilter for iphone. Other people use gamblock.
You will need to block all devices. I think it costs about £12
per month for mine but saves me hundreds- I have very poor will power.
Hope this helps

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Hi lisaanne – hope u didn’t feel excluded in chat – I guess it is difficult when u don’t know people but it gets easier .
You have done really well today – payday is hard

Keep strong – catch u in chat soon
Xx

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Hi Monica
Hope all is good with you
It must be strange to have Pete packing his stuff – a big change – a new start. Will doggie go to?
Hope to meet you in group soon .
Xx

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Not killing each other is great in my book Laura !
Marriage is hard and if I’m honest I don’t really see he point to it !
But that’s just me !

Laura just look at how youbare moving up in the world – anew car and hiring a gardener – could you have believed that was possible in your gambling days ?
Just shows you what can achieved when we really put int he effort .
So happy for u
Xx

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Way to go Lisaanne!

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Hi Laura
I never thought about that before – how lowering expectations can enhance happiness .
It’s so true. I guess even as parents – we give birth, dream of the great heights our children will reach and somewhere along the way we usually have to accept that they are people in their own right and will make the mistakes we did (hopefully not the addiction ones though!) and find their own way . It may not be the way we had imagined their lives turning out ,but when we lower our expectations we can enjoy our kids instead of beating ourselves up about where things went wrong ! I guess it’s the same with most things in life .
I really like that – it is kinda liberating – I am one of those people who never really achieve because of my lofty ideas – for example – I am quite good at decorating but when I decide to decorate I decide I need new skirting boards , then I think I need new doors and door frames , then I think I will need the surrounding plaster touched up so in actual fact nothing gets done .

I never thought of it like this before – but fresh paint looks a lot better than old chipped and dirty paintwork.

It sounds so simple but it really feels like This could be on a cure for my procrastination. Lowering expectations means something gets done instead of nothing !

Onwards and upwards !

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Hi Ciaran
Welcome to GT. you have a gambling addiction which means you will never be able to gamble normally . The only thing we can do is stop completely.
Like you I find it impossible to stop so I have to have barriers in place . For example I have a gambling blocker on my phone , I have cut up credit cards. Other barriers include self banning from from casinos and getting someone else to handle your money and give you a small allowance for which you are accountable .

Throw everything you have at this Ciaran – you deserve that feeling of having money in the bank , you fewer to go travelling and you deserve to be free of this horrible addiction.
It’s really hard to stop but many people on here have done it .

Well done on recognising that you have a problem
And well done on seeking help .

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