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Hi Kin
What an awful brave and wise decision to change jobs .
I can hear from your posts that this has removed a lot of temptation and given you stability .
Sure the work is hard and pays less but you are still richer than when you gambled – you have a better and more stable life !
Well done – keep strong !

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Hi Stephen
Well said !
Whatever happens with your relationship will happen.
Seek recovery for you – because you deserve a happy and free life .

Gambling helps us escape all kinds of issues and puts us off making hard choices .

You will not be successful if you stop gambling for someone else – do it for you !

Really start to believe that Stephen deserves this – no more worry , heartache and shame !

Keep strong !

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Just missed u and Mon in chat !

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Hi Monica Firstly – some people can have romantic relationships but perhaps are best not living together- why not ?

Life is short, love makes it sweeter and do whatever makes u happy ! There are no rules !

I think our self-imposed financial limitations have us looking at everything differently- we know that we are fortunate in that we still have earning power -(yes power because money is power) and we realise that not everyone who makes mistakes or cannot get by is as fortunate .

It’s a cruel world – in many ways human society is as ferocious as wild packs of animals – where the weak are left to fend for themselves or abandoned .

We pretend at being civilised by helping certain segments of society but in truth we prefer to ignore the more feral parts of our nature and our society . For example We leave homeless people to die exposed to the elements each year just as animals abandon their weak … and if they have an addiction – we can excuse ourselves from guilt and blame that.

So maybe I am getting old and grumpy too but I look and I see and I don’t like a lot of what I see !

Onwards and upwards xx

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Laura i love when I check GT and u have written on your own thread .
I agree with all you have said –
Let’s not give those fat cats another penny .
Xx

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Vera

This is great news – you have not hit rock bottom.

You  are a strong woman  – you can draw a line in the sand and move on from this .

Your fund  is intact and you havent undone all your immense efforts.

There is enough money in there  for your son’s wedding .

I am so glad you put restrictions on that account – well done for that .

Get back on the horse Vera- you will  ok !

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All good here – getting ready for a family hol- which is easier because I have been gamble free! Things are still tight and will be for some time but it’s amazing how quickly things improve once we stop gambling.

You will find that too- perhaps it might be an idea to visit your son this week- you don’t have to give him anything except your time .!

Keep strong – things will get better – that’s an absolute promise !

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So deeply sorry to read this Vera but also so full of admiration for your bravery in coming back to share and seek help.

It is a constant battle – the urges are never far away and the temptation is overwhelming. You have achieved an amazing 27 months and you can do it again.

Denial is useful but so is action- when you are ready you can start a new plan and start to rebuild the money .

Of course we all know it’s not just about the money – it’s the horrible feelings you described on Lizbeth’s thread – the horrible aftermath when reality kicks in.

You have helped so many on here – start a new thread and let the community help you through this .
Xx

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Hi Stephen
In response to your recent post

What can you do right now to help yourself ?
What small step can you take ?

Now do it !

Xx

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Hi Monica
Move to Ireland. !!
We have just had a blissful and freak heat wave !

Bills drive me mad – as do broken appliances .
My washing machine is broken. It is so annoying and yet it is not lost on me that I can afford to go to the local laundrette – simple things that a little money makes a lot better !

Flights definitely are not good for our health !!
Hope to catch u in chat over the next few days

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Go Lizbeth – make all those calls and all those appointments right now while you are feeling motivated .
You deserve the best – you are as important as your daughters, grandchildren , your mother and your sister –
Can you hear what I am saying? They are no more important than you and their lives and happiness are no more important than yours.
You are as important as any other person in the whole country – why wouldn’t you be ?
Take the time to get yourself into a good place with your recovery .
Take the time for Lizbeth – it’s time to really believe that you are worth it and when doubts arise ask yourself why you could possibly be worth less than anyone else .

Onwards and upwards Lizbeth!

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Hi Sherrie ,
Great to see you posting .
Yes working for free is far cheaper than gambling .
Suddenly I want to do a jigsaw – it feels like the internet has taken over everybody’s life .

Xx

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Stephen For many people (including me ) grief / shock etc what what triggered gambling addiction. In truth , it would be next to impossible for treatment to succeed while your mother was going through treatment – because it would be the wrong time to give up your escape . It is still a difficult time for you because you are grieving . For too long we (yes all of us compulsive gamblers ) have gambled to escape feeling what we found too hard to feel. Guilt is often a part of grief – if you had visited your mother every day you would still feel guilty. If you had been by her bedside night and day you would still feel guilty. Grief is horrible and losing a parent feels like we are having our guts wrenched from our bodies – it hurts too much . Perhaps pick up the phone to Cuan Mhuire and see if here is any follow up you can do . I feel you are ready to stop . I feel you are dealing with so much right now it will be good for you to get help. Your brother has reached out to you but he is grieving too . You will get there Stephen . You will do it this time . GOd will help you .

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Hi MV
Weill done on recognising that you have a problem and on looking for help with it .

Many of us started out addiction with a jackpot ! It kinda did something to our brain chemistry !

For me he only way to stay stoped is by having barriers which make it impossible to gamble . As my biggest problem has always been online gambling I have blockers on all my internet devices – I also attend groups on here .
I only now have a joint account which my husband has access to so he can see if money is disappearing.

It might be helpful for you to self – exclude from your local casino and also it might help to ask a friend. To manage your money for now and give u am allowance when you need it .

I found it very hard to tell anyone – and this makes it so much harder to stop. If there is GA near you that helps some people.

Hope this helps and well done on taking the first step towards freedom from this horrible addiction!

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Hi Lizbeth
You are in post gambling panic mode .
It is the most horrible feeling .
Lizbeth – what action can you take to stop this happening again? Can you go back right now and self – exclude?

It seems when things are going well you self – sabotage. Do you truly believe you deserve a life free from this and with financial peace of mind ? You absolutely do deserve to be content – life brings enough worries without this .

Perhaps when issue arise with your daughters it would be helpful if you had a therapist / counsellor you could make
An appointment with to talk things through – it would certainly be cheaper than gambling.

I wish I was there – I want to hug you and tell you I understand – I have been there so often – it is horrible . And you deserve so much more !

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