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Hi IDI,
I hope you are able to get past it as well for you. It’s hard to put you thoughts out there when you feel they will be attacked. Makes it a bit more difficult to post I would say. But hopefully this is going to be a positive thread where any discussion of thoughts will be done in a respectful and positive way. I would invite anyone who can’t do so to find somewhere else to post!!
I hope you had a good day. It was a gamble free day! I came home from physiotherapy and ended up having a long nap. I checked in group but no one was around. Head up IDI, you can do this! Onward and upward.
Laura
p.s.s – you need a thread with a more hopeful name. It’s like you are calling yourself a fool every time you go to post here. I don’t like it. Seems like you are down on yourself
Good morning I did it!
I too am glad to see your post. I also was not posting in respect of your comments re forums not doing it for you any more and no longer posting on a thread. Funny, i think sometimes we could answer some of our own questions if we just re read what we’ve posted in the past week or two. Maybe you say things in an off hand way but when said forcefully we assume you mean it. I didn’t want to disrespect you doing recovery in your own way. Sometimes counseling lets us work recovery in our own way with constructive one on one professional feedback. In addition to wonderful supportive forum friends of course! Thank-you for your support IDI. It is immensely helpful.
LauraP.S. you are far from useless. I can understand feeling demotivated and deflated. Is it lack of posts or something else that is making you feel that way? From our chats I would think in some ways you are feeling motivated. Catch you all at 10 tonight. I must run, appointment – physiotherapy. Need to shower and change in half hour!
HI Liam,
welcome to the forum. When we develop a compulsive gambling addiction quite often we are unable to stop until we hit rock bottom. After financial rock bottom we often start thinking dire thoughts! Having deep depression can come next.
It is hard to just “stop” gambling without a lot of support and barriers in place to prevent us from accessing and gambling the money we need to live day to day. Counseling, use of places like this site, Gamblers anonymous, etc can be a help. Having someone control your money so that when it does come in it is going to cover your basic necessities and not also being blown on gambling. You can do this. But you have to want to and you have to want to put in the effort. Take care,
LauraHi Peter,
This is a good place to receive some support and suggestions about how to stop gambling. It sounds like you have gotten some basic advice. Seeing a therapist is a very good idea. It sounds like you are really losing yourself and the sooner you tackle this the better. The only way I could stop when I was as bad was to be honest with a few people that I loved and trusted, and that I knew loved me. I needed them to help me stay accountable for my spending and my time. I gave one of them control of my money. I would only get a little as needed and I’d provide receipts showing what I bought and that I hadn’t returned anything. I attended Gamblers Anonymous meetings and group meetings here. I also went to counseling. If you want to beat this you need to tackle it hard with all the possible barriers and supports in place. You could look at a gambling blocker for your phone if you gamble on line. And never give up.
Laura
Hi RGC,
I’m assuming that if you’ve been trying to stop for a while that you have had problems with gambling for a while. It isn’t cashing out our winnings and going home we have become addicted to it is the act of gambling, placing the bet, the thrill or the hypnotic effect which ever your poison may be. It sounds like you have crossed the imaginary line to become a compulsive gambler. Once you have this addiction, responsible or controlled gambling is never an option that will last. The only thing for a CG to do is stop gambling all together. Some ways that you can help yourself do that are: Give control of finances to another even for a while. Not having access to funds for gambling makes it easier to fight urges. Get support. Find an addictions counselor and/or a Gamblers Anonymous or other fellowship support group. Use the forums and chat room here and on other sites like UK Gamblers Anonymous. Research the addiction by reading articles, watching documentaries, using the resources on this site. I hope you are able to take this advice as this addiction will only get worse. So many of us gambled until we had nothing left. Homes, cars, families, friendships and everything really. Try and stay strong. Watch out for depression. It tends to come with the territory.
LauraNot gambling is definitely a win! We always think we can win ourselves out of situations we put ourselves in by gambling. So maybe that never worked out according to plan either lol. I know not having money can be a trigger for me as well. You are right, we’d spend more gambling than dealing with the problem. So it isn’t really about winning money.
So well done on taking a step back, thinking it through, and then acting on your plan. That is definitely one thing I have been working on is relationships. In recovery I want real relationships and friendships. I have no time to waste on games.Good job 3racer for finding your solution and staying gamble free! You are doing awesome!
Laura
Thrilled to hear your thinking has turned around and you are feeling much better. There is always going to be challenges but now you have the support you need to deal with them. I’m so happy you are getting the support you needed to turn this around. Keep up the good work. Laura
When Tina uses GA I think she means gambling addiction instead of Gamblers Anonymous but I could be wrong.
Hi Liz,
it takes a lot of strength and courage to do what you are doing. I can only hope your daughter will come around and not keep your grandson from you. I’ve seen my nephew used as a pawn occasionally over the years against my mom. It makes one feel like they are walking on eggshells around the person all the time for fear of the child paying the price. It’s like you are being held hostage. Deep breaths! Keep working through this. You are so worth it! No self destruct. And you can’t go to the casino! Have as stress free a day as possible. LauraBok Liz, potrebno je puno snage i hrabrosti da učiniš to što radiš. Mogu se samo nadati da će se vaša kći pojaviti i neće zakloniti vašeg unuka. Vidio sam svog nećaka kako se godinama povremeno koristi kao pijun protiv moje mame. Čini se da se čovjek osjeća kao da hoda po ljusci od jaja oko osobe cijelo vrijeme iz straha da će dijete platiti cijenu. Kao da te drže kao taoca. Duboki uzdisaji! Nastavite raditi na ovome. Ti si toliko vrijedan toga! Bez samouništenja. I ne možete u kazino! Neka vam dan bude bez stresa što je više moguće. Laura
Hi JP (hope you don’t mind the shortform)
It’s good to see your posts here and there in support of others. It lets me know you are still with us, still working on building a new life. This addiction leaves us in pieces. But we can build a new life. Like the phoenix rising from the ashes. Take advantage of all supports. It may not be easy but it is worthwhile! Sending you well wishes. Laura