[female g]

hope your able to put the barriers in place to remain gamble free. This is of the utmost importance. we need to keep money, credit cards, debit cards out of our reach to make this easier on us as re try to recooperate from this addiction.
Time to get to work FG

[female g]

glad to say I am well and getting stronger every day. I am happy to say I am still gamble free. I had my first hypnosis session and I was so elated with the experience. My Doctor was so thorough and we talked for quite awhile before the session. I can’t remember much about it but I know I left feeling like I was really going to stop gambling for good. I was concerned that I was only able to do 3 sessions with him but he reassured me that I could do as many sessions as I felt i would need.When I used hypnosis to quit smoking I had gone 6 times and was worried I would need as many to be able to finally quit gambling. So I am convinced this is the key to my success. I trust him so much that I was able to completely surrender to his words. I was really deeply relaxed and took everything in. Hope that I continue to feel as strong as I feel now. FG

[female g]

yes I am lucky. I am grateful too. I want for this to be done with now so that I can return to the good life I get to live free from gambling. I am going for my first hypnosis session with my GP and want to be fully willing to give up gambling for good. FG

[female g]

hope you have a wonderful 4 days. Anything that dosen’t include gambling has got o be good for us Right???

[female g]

thanks for your support and yes I do hope that I will learn to be content with just being happy. I had alot of urges again tonight but my hubby showed up and waited it out until I was finished working. I was annoyed he showed up but happy he was there at the same time. I was fighting with myself over the urges that were being brought to the forefront with every time I looked at him sitting there. I felt torn between what was right, the guilt, ( because he felt he had to protect me from myself) and the desire to gamble. I had a busy night so he was forced to hang around for 3 hours and the poor guy didn’t sleep earlier in the evening. He had parent interviews and came from work to be there for me. I felt bad knowing it was because of me that he would have to go into work sleep deprived. I felt selfish and thoughtless. The only good outcome was that i didn’t gamble. I do believe that I can get through urges now because I don’t want to put him through much more of this. I think this is teaching me more than i would have expected.
I see that this addiction is affecting more than just my pocket book. I never really saw it for what it really was. I have never had someone take care of me like this before.
Its out of love and caring that he is doing this. I need to recipricate and be better than this addiction.
I have one other thought to share > >>
I have noticed how quickly time goes by doing everyday normal things , but when it comes to this addiction time moves so slowly when your trying not to gamble. The hours, the days, the weeks take so long to build into gamble free time. FG

[female g]

I hope it grows into another 7 months of gamble free time. I lasted 9 months one time and then thought if I could do that why couldn’t I manage my gambling. So i got started again slowly at first and within limits but it didn’t last. I got into it bigger and better than ever. Now I have 30 thousand dollars of debt, that is what the Casino gave me. Even with that knowledge I would go back if I could. The only thing that keeps me away are the barriers I have in place now. I am knowledgeable and aware of more information now more than ever yet the desire to gamble is still there. I see there really aren’t big winners in the casino’s any more and I even feel I will loose before I even enter and still the urge to gamble is strong. So the ugly truth is I must not gamble and hopefully I won’t from now on. I hope it gets easier for us both from here on in. FG

[female g]

i understand not wanting to be bored. I struggle with that too. I asked my daughter to help me with that and boy she keeps me busy. Along with my 4 grandchildren we can find plenty to do. I am having fun working on furniture projects too right now.With xmas around the corner I will be busy through till mid Janurary. Then we will have to think of getting through 2 tough months FG

[female g]

We all relate to your story and know that we must stop the one thing that we never thought could cause such damage to us , those we love and to the life we live verses the life we want to live.. We all find reasons as to why we start gambling and try to unravel those reasons in an effort to stop the madness. The thing is I think, its the “feel good” that we felt when we innocently walked in those first few times. We chased it thinking it would always be there. Wrong!!!! Nothing worth having comes that easily. We work hard for everything else in life and we would never act so carelessly for what s important in life. We are never so irresponsible with decissions that affect our families well being . If we stop giving in to the compulsion we will be able to be the people we truly are.
I see the connection between that young boy (14 year old you) and the draw that made you feel good when you were feeling so bad. It was the first time you felt in control and able to turn those feelings around. No matter what you believe you must dig deep into healing that 14 boy and give yourself a chance to know the wonderful man that is now full grown.
Change can often come if we focus on the need of others as well. Your small children can be that focus.
Look into the basic ways you stopped yourself in the past from going and implement them. Put all those barriers in place. I know giving up control is very difficult but essential. Depend on your partner for support through your honesty and vulnerability. Give her the facts and teach her to know the pitfalls you face each and every day.
Love yourself enough to regain your ability to fight as hard as you can to remain gamble free. Mistakes will be made but the damage can be curbed and you can always move beyond the mistakes to keep moving ahead.
There are no judgements here and we all need to listen to the things we say to each other and to our selves.
Keep up the good fight and keep posting ok FG

[female g]

Well there must have been something in the air because you ended up at the casino, I fought through a huge urge I almost gave into, and by the sounds of it Vera almost went to. Yikes!!!
At least the financial cost wasn’t huge. I hope you can be kind enough to forgive yourself but also hard enough on yourself to prevent it from happening again. I know it is excruciating to think we can’t gamble even every once in awhile, isn’t it? The truth is though it would start of innocently enough and it begins to grow into a huge problem that we struggle to control over and over again. I guess its better to end the misery once and for all. I am not sure I believe I can stay away forever but I am away for at least another day. Hope you can get back on track right away and find the strength you need to remain gamble free. We are here for you and understand how difficult this is FG

[female g]

I had a very busy week and made a lot of money. Friday we had colonoscopy’s and after very little food Wednesday (2 bowls of cream of wheat and nothing until Friday at 7 pm . I was starved and glad that was over and done with We went for dinner and it never tasted so good haha. . So by the time we reached home I felt I had extra money burning a hole in my wallet. I got to thinking, why not be able to go to the casino since I had made all the necessary weekly payments and I knew I had no access to money now that the line of credit had been paid. So I couldn’t do any damage financially . It was my reasoning anyway. So I asked my hubby and he flatly refused my request. I was annoyed but somehow I was able to let it go after a little while. The urge subsided and I thanked my hubby for taking care of me while I couldn’t take care of myself. I gave him money towards a tv for my daughter instead, went grocery shopping, and then spent the rest on stuff for other family members. Went for a nice dinner and put gas in the car. Money is gone but well spent. I feel satisfied that I got through a difficult time.FG

[female g]

your right and your daughter must find her own way out of addiction. Just like we do. I hope she understands the difference between support and enabling ? I believe you are doing the right thing FG

[female g]

anything that stops you from gambling is a celebration. Enjoy the cruise.!!!

[female g]

great way to end the weekend I’d say. Went for a great dinner with my hubby and just enjoyed each others company. Life is good without gambling.FG

[female g]

be that bright light for those you love and for those that love you. Eventually it will rub your mom the right way. FG

[female g]

so great to hear words of comfort and support. I am doing well still and wish the same for all who enter this cyber space. through the ups and downs of addiction we do our own personal best to rise above and try hard to reclaim what we have lost. The irony is clear isn’t it. FG

[Author]

Posts