[Dunc]

<

Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our
privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

[Dunc]

<

Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our
privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

[Dunc]

<

Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our
privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

[Dunc]

<

Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our
privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

[Dunc]

Hi KB

Whilst I’m staff at Gambling Therapy, I’m also a Gambler who hasn’t gambled for some time, The ladies and gents on friends and family forum will be with you the whole way, as will the rest of us within Gambling Therapy.

I try and back away from F&F as in all honesty they know more about living with a gambler than a gambler can comprehend, but you’ve hit on a few points that I’d like to reply too.

You said ” If my words are being distorted is there anything I can say?” the truth, No, remember that if your arguing or discussing with someone whose mind frame is illogical and distorted then how can a logical mind understand their answers, to you its incomprehensible, this will just round in a cycle until if an argument hasn’t started one probably will, that doesn’t mean you give in it means you have to learn coping skills to help you

Does a distorted gambler whose manipulating, distorting know or be able to control their words, the chances are no they can’t control it, irrespective if they know their right or wrong, the addiction is just that strong.. at the end of my gambling life of 25 I did start to see things from the other side, but even then I still needed professional help as well as support groups to get to an understand what I was doing and how to help me think rationally and logically to remove these traits and thoughts and suppress my addiction

What May really help you is to use the F& F groups but also use the community groups, whilst the F&F groups are 100% F&F the community groups
are for Gamblers and those affected, there also moderated but mostly the CG’s within our site are so serious about their recovery their very open to
talking about how they feel… you have the opportunity to talk to gamblers and ask them how they feel, how they reacted. This is something that may just help you more than you realise

KB, the following link is to a brilliant website, it explains how to talk, the do’s and don’ts… and you can always pop onto the helpline and talk

http://www.responsiblegambling.org/get-help/for-someone-else-who-gambles

Take Care KB, you’ve 13000 members all behind you now, your never alone and the answers are normally always here

Take Care

Harry

[Dunc]

Charles

So Simple, but so true… love it

Harry

[Dunc]

Charles

So Simple, but so true… love it

Harry

[Dunc]

Hi R2C

A fantastic achievement, you should be really prod of yourself.

The issue that often arises when counting days and months is where we stop counting, where we move on and don’t worry about when we last gambled and focus on recovery going forward where the only next date that should be an issue is the date of the next bet.

I’ve always had an issue with —–ing, the reason in my opinion is it’s a goal and once that goal is reached there are a few things that can happen

1. A new Goal is set
2. Complacency becomes an issue
3. Testing can I after “X” period control the situation

R2C, it’s a huge achievement, all I ask is you take care at this time, Goals are like bets in many ways, If we make it then we get a high… if we don’t we get a low, both potential triggers for a gambler… if we don’t count then we move on in recovery without having the added stress of a goal that can become a trigger

It’s still a fabulous achievement, You should be really proud

Take Care

Harry

[Dunc]

Hi C993

Firstly well done on finding the courage to talk to your sister, I and I imagine most on this site have asked for help financially to bail us out of trouble. Unfortunately there comes a time that they simply won’t help, and really who can blame them after all they have heard it all before, what they need is to see is you making things right, they need to see commitment; words become meaningless. In the long run and you may not see this yet, being bailed out financially just prolongs your ability to gamble, it really can stop you seeing the true consequences of your actions… If you truly want recovery, ytour have to find your own way out of your financial issue. The second someone help your addiction will jump in and start to think… Hmmm maybe I can gamble this and double it or hey if I lose they will help me again and the cycle continues

Seeing a Psychotherapist is a fantastic choice and one that can really help, I’d just like to add my view on why GA as an addition may help.

A Psychotherapist is one person with ideas that will help you see a way forward… but its still one opinion

Gamblers Anonymous is a group of Compulsive Gamblers who attend meetings with one purpose, to suppress their own addiction, to help keep the addiction suppressed and to help those seeking help.

In essence your get a broader range of ideas, support, knowledge in the safe surrounding of others whom understand just how you feel. A Psychotherapist & GA, with support from us via the forums, groups and helpline is a fantastic combination

Take Care

Harry

[Dunc]

Hey Nani

Im so glad your appointment went well. Remember breakdown what needs to be done making sure that its feasible. Making it unrealistic just ensures failure and boy what a great trigger that can be.

The relief when you exclude will help so much, when you’ve done that hopefully your post about your next realistic goal

Take Care

Harry

[Dunc]

<

Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our
privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

[Dunc]

Hey Howanan

It’s lovely to see you back to our lovely new site, I’m so sorry you’ve had to deal with so much, but what strength you have. It reminds me of Charles posts about good and brilliant days, went something like this

A Good day is when everything goes well and you don’t gamble
A Brilliant day is when everything goes badly and you don’t gamble

Your an inspiration, please keep coming back, your never know just how many people may read your thread and find the strength they need all thanks to you.

Take Care

Harry

[Dunc]

Great question, and one that’s been asked so many times &I like Charles couldn’t have given up without help.

Working on the helpline the question is asked can I stop alone. For various I can’t say 100% no that recovery can’t be gained without help

1. I’ve not met every gambler, but as of yet I’ve not met a true CG whose found recovery without help

2. Not every Gambler is compulsive, they may just have used gambling recreationally and its run away with them for a short while, but we have to remember that this addiction is progressive. If you ask any CG whose accepted recovery when the y went from recreational to problematic to compulsive I doubt they could answer

A compulsive gambler in denial will be asking and answering their own distorted questions with their own distorted answers, the perpetual cycle will continue until someone can challenge what you’re saying and thinking. This then brings up the next question “when does a CG know that they are thinking in a distorted way” the one answer in my opinion is to talk to people who are living without distorted thoughts like other CG’s in recovery who have almost definitely done this and seen and know they can’t trust their own thoughts, this can be done at GA, GT, CBT, Counseling etc or any other support group… trying to find recovery alone will remove this option and that in my opinion is the biggest reason a CG cannot find recovery alone.

Then my last question is “why would we want to find recovery alone” ? the answer is normally “I’m Ashamed” or in a some instances the truth is a CG knows the above and hasn’t quiet yet got to the point of accepting the reality or his or her addiction

[Dunc]

Unfortunately we did have a few glitches last night, this was due to the database transfer to the new server, the issue has been identified and and rectified

Were so sorry for any inconvenience

Take Care

Harry

[Dunc]

Hi Dale,

Sorry your profile looks fine. If you carry on experiencing issues can you email us
or pop onto the helpline when it’s open and were see what is wrong.

Can I ask which language you’re accessing the site from? We do run un-moderated groups in languages other than English, but the moderated, gambler & topic groups are at the moment only available in English

Kind Regards

Harry

[Author]

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