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Dear Bettie! I am soooooooo relieved that your brother-in-law got this awesome job! It does seem like divine intervention from what you say. Carole
Dear Bettie! Too bad you couldn’t post a picture of your brand new 2012 fabulous Chevy Cruze car! And now that you don’t smoke it will have that new car smell. I’m back from the city and tired as it’s been a long stressful day. Carole
Dear Bettie! I wasn’t concerned about travelling in style to the conference. When Danny and I got together almost 18 years ago, we had nothing. I was between jobs in my field and was cleaning rich people’s houses 5 days a week, 8 hours a day for six months, and Danny was unemployed. We has an old brown truck that seemed to need a quart of oil every few miles. And he owed his parents a lot of money. Congratulations on your new ride! The first question most of us women ask is what color is it? I know it hurts a lot to see family members struggle. I hope that things can turn around for them soon. It’s always scary to buy something new like a vehicle or other big purchase. That’s probably why the smoking and gambling urges hit. Carole
Dear Larry! How I wish I had handled the past 3 1/2 months differently, but I can’t change the past. You inspire me greatly that you did not gamble when your brother died. Today is only day 7 gamble free for me, but I’m going to take it a day at a time. I don’t like where the gambling over the three week period took me, and I don’t want to go back there again. It’s back to painting doors for me today. Carole
Dear Bettie! Way to go on the 3 workouts! The Elvis dinner show sounds fabulous!! Maybe you have a snake in your TV speaker. Just kidding!! I’m terrified of snakes! Living in the country I have had two occasions where I’ve been raking in the spring, once by the firepit wood pile, and a three foot garter snake slittered out. Nobody was home but I screamed and ran into the house. I was done raking for that day. When we first moved in, a family member said they saw a snake on the property, and I was sure that I couldn’t live in the country because of that. A new vehicle sounds nice, though I understand it will be difficult on your finances. Can you sell your older vehicle and put the money down on the new vehicle, and extend the payments for as long as you can? I hate to see you having more stress financially. Carole
I don’t know what planet I’m living on today, wishing you a good weekend, when it’s only Tuesday. Carole
Dear Bettie! Sorry to hear about the insulin 4 times a day and the 4 times a day testing. Perhaps it’s a good thing as you will have a better handle on managing your glucose levels by being aware, thus less damage to your body. You sure do have a lot of health challenges, more than most people. I imagine you’re going to feel like a pin cushion though. Vera is right that diabetes affects a lot of people that aren’t overweight. My daughter’s MIL is normal weight and she has severe diabetes, as do many members of that family. Hope you’re doing OK and enjoying your weekend. Carole
Dear Larry! That does sound very aggravating your experience with upgrading your internet connection. At least you knew something about the equipment you were dealing with, unlike me that could never have resolved this. Thanks for sharing your Mardi Gras experience, as I have never been there. I am looking forward to meeting you in Chicago for the conference. I’m so glad you decided to go. I’m back to Recovery 101 and need to take the time to do the things that worked for me in the past to remain gamble free. The past 3 1/2 months have been a stressful time for me, with my MIL being hospitalized November 12, and subsequently dying in December. Then In January, my sister who is an alcoholic, tried to suicide, and after acute care ended up in a locked unit at a mental hospital, and then in rehab thankfully. Then to wait for 3 weeks to see if I had the job I applied for, only to see it go to a way less qualified person who already worked there, felt like a personal rejection which is a huge trigger for me. I wish I could say I didn’t gamble during these stressful times, but I can’t. It is what it is. All I can do is move forward. I was feeling like such a failure at recovery because I wasn’t able to manage without gambling. But I used to gamble almost every day so I have to measure my success in a different manner. I can say that most of my days have been gamble free during my 14 months of recovery. You mention Valentine’s Day. Some of us are married and still have no one to share that day with. My husband was working out of town, and didn’t leave me a card at home. I gave him one to take with him back to work so he would have it on that day. No preorder of flowers, nothing! No little hidden treat at home. It was a bit disappointing, but I have to look at the big picture of the things he does for me, the rest of the time. It would be nice if you could find someone to share your life with, but that’s not easy to do these days, especially when we get older. If I was single at this stage of my life, I wouldn’t know how to do this myself. I wouldn’t be able to know if someone was being kind or was "hitting on me" like my granddaughter calls it. Those internet meeting/dating sites scare me, as I believe that most people lie like crazy on them. Maybe church or a GA meeting might be the place to meet someone of quality. Carole
Dear Bettie! I bet you’re loving the big screen tv and new furniture. Nice to get some money back from the government for a change as it always seems that we do nothing but pay them. I didn’t get that fulltime position that I applied for and it’s a long, sordid story, but I’m so over it now. I feel like someone else lived my life for the almost 3 weeks I waited to hear. I have learned that I cannot handle big stressors at this point in recovery. I need predictability and a quiet stable life. So from now on I’m going to continue to paint room by room, and will take renters in when I feel like it. I gave notice to my crazy neighbour and they have to be out by May 31st. I’m hoping they find a place before that. I tolerated her crazy behavior for three years and I’ve had enough craziness with them. She is convinced that her sister-in-law put a bugging device in their biggest TV set and in their truck. So they don’t watch that TV. She was convinced that her MIL and/or SIL had gotten a hold of her IP address and were monitoring her computer communications, so she poured a pitcher of water on her laptop. The list goes on and on! I am looking forward to the conference in April. I haven’t got a confirmation back from the Chicago GA people yet, that I’m registered for the conference. Carole
Dear Bettie! I was planning to see that movie, because a friend of mine wants to see it. I didn’t know it was shot in Chicago so I’ll be paying extra attention now. Good for you for trying to quit smoking again. My daughter ran 21 km this morning in 2 hours 17 minutes- her first hypothermic marathon she said. I can scarcely believe that someone could run that far in so little time. I’ve had her 3 year old since Friday 10:30 am, so it will be nice when her Mommy and Daddy come and get her later today. Husband is angry at me as I have told him that I plan on euthanizing the Bouvier I adopted last summer. He said something to the effect of stop donating to the animal shelter, put yourself on a list so they won’t let you adopt any more animals………. and hung up. He also sent me an email begging me to not to take HIS Mic to the vet. I’m still taking him to the vet as I can’t continue to live under the stress the dog causes me. Husband just called me back. Said the dog is not sick and can’t believe I would do that to him. Mic thrashed my bed trying to get at the cat on Friday. He has previously destroyed a leather recliner chair. Now to have to fight with my husband about my decision makes it so much harder. Carole
Dear Bettie! You would have been an awesome Grandma, and you will be when it happens for you. I’m happy to hear that you’re not stressing about us meeting up for the conference, as I wondered if that was affecting your state of mind. I am looking forward to meeting you as is Reds! I’m not sure which things you think you worked hard for and that you feel you didn’t work hard enough for. If it’s the quitting smoking, you did well to stay quit for so long. It’s like compulsive gambling I find. One of the toughest addictions to let go of. I couldn’t do it as I thought of smoking all the time plus I had more urges to gamble. So I figured that smoking was cheaper financially, and decided to go with that. I love tulips and pink gerberra daisies. I too have bought myself flowers because I wasn’t getting any from my husband. Good for you for doing something nice for yourself. Your friend always, Carole
Dear Bettie! Thought I’d bring your thread to the top. Somehow I "sense" that everything isn’t well in Bettie’s world. Hope I’m wrong! Carole
Dear Bettie! The miscarriage is still raw for Jen, but perhaps by the time the baby shower happens, Jen will be more at peace with it. The lead up to an event is usually more painful than the actual event I have found, over and over. She can choose not to go like you mentioned, and people will understand. She may even be pregnant herself by the time the shower rolls around. A day at a time for all of us. I’m looking forward to Chicago. Still haven’t heard from Oprah as to whether we can hang out with her when we’re there. lol! Carole
Dear Bettie! Glad to hear that you’re feeling better, and are going to be able to buy yourself a "reward." It is true that most, if not all of us, do go through low emotional times, and they can last a while. But I remember feeling worse than low every day when I was actively gambling. I started a gratitude journal where I write down 5 things about what I’m grateful for daily. I wish I could say I write in it every day, but there are days I’m busy with everything non-gambling related. I find that if I focus on the positives, then that becomes the big picture. Even with my hubby, I focus on what he is, as opposed to what he isn’t. Did I mention that my ticket to Chicago is non-refundable?? I already told the excutive director that I needed those days in April off. Carole
Dear Bettie! Sorry to hear that you are struggling with so many things. I wish life wasn’t so difficult for you. You are doing well not gambling, even though you have a lot of stress in your life, pretty much on a daily basis. It’s hard as parents not to see our kids living up to their potential, and them being in a less than ideal relationship. There is much to be grateful for, like a roof over our head and having a fulltime job. On an offnote, I will probably be going back to work fulltime, which is something I have not had to do for a decade. Happy Recovery Day! Carole