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Dear (((CC)))! You have changed because you’re right back here. I have made a lot of changes yet today I had the urge to gamble and stood there debating with myself whether I should gamble or not. Dust yourself off and keep working recovery because you and your small family deserve it. We’re not all or nothing people anymore. Progress not perfection! Carole
Dear (((Cat)))! You haven’t been posting. I hope you are going along fine and working recovery to the best of your ability. I am enjoying my new small dogs. They are very bonded with each other and with me. The boy dog Zac reminds me of me. If I don’t keep my eye on him, he’s down the road gone to the neighbours, playing with their dogs. He is either unaware of the dangers that lurk like big predatory birds, coyotes, foxes, lynx, etc. or he’s foolhardy and a risk taker, like me. I’m hoping to only take calculated risks this year, and a day at a time manage my recovery. It would be great if you could write a line or two and let us know how and what you’re doing these days. Carole
Dear (((CC)))! I have to agree with SG. You don’t just help yourself, you help others. I love getting a post from you. For some people a break is code for gambling. No accountabliltity!! Not saying that it’s that for you. Carole
Dear (((SG)))! Wow! You must have done something right to have an ex who is still so supportive and loving towards you. Were you aware that the vehicle didn’t have up to date tags? Sorry that happened to you and that "someone" forgot to put money in your account so that you could treat yourself. I sometimes forget how difficult early recovery can be but I can promise you that it does get a whole lot easier over time. Hang in there and be the best you can be for your kids and yourself. Congratulations on 12 days of freedom from this nasty, horrible disease we have. Carole
Dear Razzabelle! Congratulations on paying your mortgage instead of going to the venue and probably losing the money you have probably worked hard for. I’m sure that feels a lot better than driving home from the racino broke, even though you say you feel Yucky tonight! You say that your partner is unwilling to self-exclude himself, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t. Once he sees you, over time, being successful in your recovery, he may want to try recovery himself. As mothers when we know better, we do better for our children and ourselves. We’ll never regret recovery, but we will regret having our gambling affect our children’s lives. You and your children deserve your recovery. Carole
So good to hear that (((icandothis)))! Carole
A day at a time is all we need to get through (((Hetty)))! Many of us go along fine and then for whatever reason we have to fight urges that tell us at *****, "so what if you go for a little gamble?" The addicted mind tries to minimize the damage a little gamble will do to us. It’s never a little damage emotionally. It’s a battle for our lving the life we were intended to live, and for some people it has been a battle that has cost them their very life, because they could see no way out. Hetty, I mentioned to my daughters about the 100 bust exhibit you are part of and they wanted to know if you would be willing to share any links about this project as they think it is an idea that rocks, and they are involved in organizing the Relay for Life that is held in our town each year, to raise lots of money for cancer research. Carole
My advice (((CC))) is not to take a break. I would use the forum to get stuff out, whether you’re feeling good or low. Carole
Hi Izzi! From my own personal experience, most men greatly underestimate what it costs for things. Could you negotiate with your Dad where you would give him a weekly account of your expenditures, item by item, with receipts? It would give you both a realistic account of where your money is going, and maybe the two of you could agree on a weekly "allowance" that you could spend socializing. That may lessen the strain of having your father manage your finances. Carole
Dear (((Hetty)))! What’s going on in your life right now that would make you have strong urges to gamble?? Sometimes when I can identify the stress in my life it becomes clearer to me why I have thoughts/urges. Hope you get some peace of mind real soon and those nasty urges pass. Carole
Dear (((Debbie)))! Great choice not succumbing to the big urge to gamble. Every time we make a good decision like that, it strenghtens us in our recovery. It was great that you were at the ladies meeting last night. It’s been so long since you and I have "talked." How’s Bruno doing? I hope that you can find a place where you can have him with you again. Carole
Dear (((Bettie)))! I laughed that your boss had to do his job because his boss was there. I guess there was no reading the newspaper and putting his feet up. Lol! First thing I did after the meeting was go eat 6 chocolates. Seems I’m easily influenced by even the word chocolate. That was a great meeting I thought! You and I both know what it’s like to lose a sibling, so I felt so sorry for that woman with her very recent loss. Carole
Dear (((Bettie)))! Great that you had a good time going out, but us "fall" chickens don’t bounce back like we used to when we were spring chickens. I saw you posted on a few people’s threads with really good advice and support. Have you heard from Vera? Carole
Dear (((CC)))! You haven’t posted since you spoke of awful urges, but I’m believing that you made it through unscathed, and didn’t gamble. You shared what the difference is now with you when you get urges. You’re able to reason things out in your brain, instead of running off gambling. Do you have a project that you’d like to do like repaint a room or a porch? If so, why not have the brush, the paint, etc handy when you have a day where your addiction tries to suck the life out of you , by being so relentless. Start painting, do meditation or deep breathing exercises till you feel relaxed. Our addiction wants us to start off the year by gambling so that it is in control, not us. So that we feel like failures, instead of the rock stars that we are. Carole
Dear (((SG)))! I would look into Bettie’s suggestion about whether there is any way you can make financial arrangements to get your car back. Bettie is a wizard when it comes to things like that, due to her occupation. When there seems to be no way to do something, Bettie has a way that others haven’t thought about, or seems impossible to do. I had to laugh about what Sherry posted because my husband would have done the same thing. They just don’t get it! Congratulations on every single one of your gamble free days. Carole