[Dazza85]

No need to apologise matey, I’m thankful to have you guys here to talk too. It all helps! And for what it’s worth I’m here for you all too!

[Dazza85]

Wow Nick, I’ve sat and read every one of your posts here. Your actually quite inspirational, well done to you! I accepted me problems a week ago, and today I slipped. Just once, but I slipped.. I’m so determined to stop, and reading your journal has given me extra inspiration to pick myself up and start again! Thank you Nick

[Dazza85]

So annoyed with myself. There are no excuses I talked myself into it, I guess this proves to me I need to ban myself from the shops local to me. I’ve always bet online, I’ve never been into a bookies before today, that’s not something i want to start.

The good news is I hated being in there, felt so uncomfortable and awkward – it wasnt the nicest of experience! I’m thinking I should destroy the bet – that way regardless of a loss or win I just dont watch the game and il never know!

I’m scared if i let it go and it wins it will tempt me back? Your right though, I’m here because I need, and appreciate all of your support. You all keep it real, and you understand, that’s what nobody else gets, the why. My best mate was like ” stop being stupid just dont have a bet”.. argh.

[Dazza85]

Today is Day 7, and I walked into the local bookies and placed a bet. Only a small bet, for the weekends final in football. I am so annoyed with myself. So so annoyed. I lasted 6 full days. So angry that I’ve let myself down like this. I have no access to anything on phone, I blocked it all, but I was in my local town today shopping and told myself a small flutter on the weekend wouldn’t hurt me. What a total dickhead I am..

[Dazza85]

I totally understand this, the thing is a big big win usually came way down the line.  So it takes 2 weeks minimum to big win it, but one things for sure everytime it comes your not even break even! It’s all bullshit.. lose £2k, then eventually win £1k. Your still down, yet now your brain acts like your up, then we repeat. It’s a joke and an addiction that we need to stay well away from. We can do this! 

[Dazza85]

Thanks for the lovely comments guys – coming on here and reading them genuinely helps a lot ! So thank you 🙂
Today is Day 5 without a bet, my first gamble free weekend in pretty much forever. Saturday felt so hard I had it on my mind the whole day, but Sunday I took my family to the cinema and out for lunch! We watched Secret life of pets – usually i would of been scanning my phone for live results- but not this weekend! It felt great to sit and just enjoy time with my family.

I think i have this, but in the quiet times of day I do still think about bets, think about the tipping group, but I have to remind myself for that 1 win they get, actually they lose 3 to 4 weeks before it !

1 week until our family holiday, just this week to get through in work. I applied for a 0% credit card so I can at least try to shift debt while I now spend the life time trying to bloody repay it all.

Today is day 5, and for the first time I’m starting to feel proud of my accomplishments with this!

[Dazza85]

A tough day. My first Saturday not gambling in about 13 years. I dont know what to do with myself. I’m actually sitting around (Its my day off work) thinking about betting. I cant because I installed Gamban on my devices, and just incase I self excluded myself before hand on all SIX online accounts i had !

The day feels shit. But i have not gambled ! I saw on Facebook the ‘WhatsApp group’ I had followed had a big win yesterday. Inevitable I quit and they all win!

I removed that geoup on Facebook, i dont need to see that shit!

[Dazza85]

Thanks for the message RG.  Your absolutely correct, I have to accept what’s gone is gone, moving to the future! No more chasing, no more gambling! I realised last night that Gamban doesnt work if your on a wifi, so in a panic I through my details in Gamstop.  Hopefully that’s enough to prevent any hiccups down the line ! 

Day 2 today- it feels strange not waking up and spending my first hour putting together the days bets from the ‘WhatsApp group’.  I dont need that! Today I will buy some flowers for the Mrs, rather than wasting it into horses.. 

Day 2! I’m on this !

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