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Hi Bettie,
I look at it this way. There are a lot of people with problems in this world, gambling or otherwise, most don’t have the courage to do anything about it. This is a tough addiction and needs tough steps to tackle it. There are a lot of people here in the Forums and at your GA meeting who are showing great courage in addressing this addiction, as there are at mine.
So I can say I am definitely proud to go to GA and I know that my family is proud of me for taking those tough steps that I needed to take.I hope that one day you realise and can say a big YES if you are asked that question again 🙂 You deserve to feel proud.
Sounds like that monkey on your back is really getting to you! A basttard is he? I’d agree! Time to beat him up a bit maybe? Whack him on the head with a GA meeting? Punch him in trhe gut by getting banned from that casino? Give him a bloody nose by asking your girlfriend or a family member to help you look after your money or to make you accountable for it?
Much as I hate animal cruelty it sounds like it’s time to give this particular monkey a good kicking!
I too am a Compulsive gambler and, like Harry says, I too was bailed out many times by my family. It never really helped me. In fact i would go so far as to say that if i was still getting bailed out I would still be gambling.
Well done on contacting that psychotherapist.
As Harry says there comes a time when words don’t mean much to those around us, they ahve heard it all before. How about asking your sister to go with you as moral support when you go and get excluded from the casino or where ever it is you gamble?
Maybe she could also help by making you accountable for what money you do have? That would help in two ways – make it harder for you to gamble if you do get an urge and also reassure her that you aren’t.Hi again C993,
It sounds like it’s time to take control of things yourself then. Much better for your recovery than a bail out anyway.
If you are unable to come to arrangements with your creditors yourself there is lots of help available these days. Lots of options from some sort of repayment plan right through to bankruptcy, with of course lots in between.
If you can connect to the helpline when it is open then one of my colleagues will be able to give you links to places where you can get advice as to the best option for you, free advice. Alternatively click on the Resources Link at the top of this page and take a look yourself.
Of course though whatever arrangements you make regarding the finances won’t be of any long term benefit unless you find a way to stop gambling.
When you did speak to your sister what did you tell her you were going to do differently this time? Did you check out where your local GA meetign was or any of the other options I suggested in my previous post?
Good luck with your appointment tomorrow Nani. You are not helpless anymore. You will have the support of your counselling and the support here. What other steps can you take? What barriers can you put in place? The pain you are feeling right now will fade, the finances will improve again. That’s when it’s important to have things in place so try and put as many things in place now, while you can’t/don’t want to gamble, and then you will be in a better position if any urges return. keep posting.
Good luck in your new home Lizbeth.
It’s good to see you intend to keep posting. Next time I see you in a group I have a suggestion for you.
Hello C993 and welcome.
For me it helps to not just present the problem. Tell them what you are going to DO to address the problem as well.
Show them this site. Maybe tell them which Gamblers Anonymous meeting you are going to attend, maybe one of them could drive you to your first meeting. Take a family member with you as moral support when you exclude from where ever it is you normally gamble. Ask someone to make you accountable for your money so that you can’t gamble and just as importantly they can see you can’t/aren’t gambling.
See what i mean? It’s an old saying – actions speak louder than words.
Keep posting and let us know how it goes. Let us know what positive actions you are taking.
Great post Hownanan, thank you.
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Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums
Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!
Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick tokeeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to beupdated on your progress or share something with you.
And on that note….
I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂
Take care
The Gambling Therapy Team
PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!
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Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums
Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!
Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick tokeeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to beupdated on your progress or share something with you.
And on that note….
I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂
Take care
The Gambling Therapy Team
PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!
Hi Monique,
Welcome to the team.Hi P, I hope you change your mind about posting here. When things are bad it’s the time to use more support not less. As a CG i also know that we can’t do it on our own so if you do stop posting here what support are you going to use instead? Hope to see you posting again soon. maybe see you in a group as well.
You are coming across as a CG sharing their own experiences Dan and by doing so you will be doing what everyone comes here to do – helping yourself. 🙂 Of course everyone who posts here gives others the opportunity to learn from their experiences, apply the things that help to their own situation etc So by helping ourselves we also have the opportunity to help others. No disclaimer needed 🙂 Keep posting
Hi, I’m pretty sure this question got answered before. Unfortunately I think it was one of the threads that hasn’t transferred completely since the switchover to a new site. Hey ho, no problem – I can answer it again now. 🙂
First of all I personally don’t think an addiction can be “cured” anyway. If by “cured” you mean can an addict return to “normal” gambling then the answer would be no. However in the same way that an alcoholic can lead a life in sobriety we can also have a happy life without gambling.
Can we do this “without going to therapy”? Well again it depends what you mean. I am a Compulsive gambler and have never been to any sort of therapist, I’ve also not had a bet in a fairly long time now so the answer to your literal question is yes.
If you mean “Can we do it on our own?” Now that’s a different question. I certainly couldn’t. if someone is even looking at a site like this then they will almost certainly have tried to do it on their own first, equally without success or they wouldn’t be here. I tend to work on the basis that if we could do it on our own then we wouldn’t be in trouble in the first place. Luckily we don’t have to these days; there is lots of help available to us. This site and others, Gamblers Anonymous meetings, counselling, therapy, even residential support. I have in the past worked on the helpline here. The most important advice I could ever give anyone was to use the help that is available.
