[cat438]

I am sorry that you are facing all these challenges right now. It is terrible how this gambling addiction changes us. What starts out as a bit of fun turns into a nightmare!! I know from earlier posts and being on chat that you are going through so much with your husband’s illness and I don’t think anyone should judge another person. I know that I believe that with all my heart after becoming a compulsive gambler or whatever we want to call it. I know that there is an organization called better’s anonymous and apparently with that one you don’t have to say the date you last placed a bet. All the stress you are going through right now sounds unbearable. I cant imagine how I would feel if my daughter going for open heart surgery. Keep posting as I believe it helps to just write everything down and get it out.

[cat438]

You really are such a wonderful and caring person. I know that I have not posted for a while as I have been going through a “blue spell”. I know you understand what I mean.
I want to thank you for posting to me even when I was not posting as I read them, but could not seem to find the energy to sit and post. I have not been gambling which is awesome, but have not been feeling positive or grateful. I am working on getting back on track and looking at all that I have to be grateful for.
Thanks for being you Sweet Pea!!! Enjoy your “gamble free day”

[cat438]

I have not gambled so far in February and do not plan on gambling today. It is always one day at a time!!!

[cat438]

You really are an amazing and brave lady. I can’t believe that someone who does not like pain would put them through all that you did to help someone. I know that the needles were tough on you, but that procedure they did to get your veins was the worst. To be fainting and passing out with it, but you continued to do it. You deserve a medal for that. I hope and pray that your stem cell donation saves the person’s life. It was truly a remarkable experience. To see your stem cells that were in the bag being put in the cooler, and knowing they were to go on a flight that evening. To know that someone was at the other end hoping and praying for them to arrive. WOW it truly is quite remarkable that I got to experience that with someone that I met here on GT. I can imagine that you are still feeling tired after all that you have been through, but you should feel really proud of yourself for what you did. Take care my friend (((Carole)))

[cat438]

I have not been posting lately as have been on a feeling blue streak, and tend to get reclusive when I am like that. I need to give myself a swift kick in the *** and get going. Our winter this year is never ending and it does tend to bring you down. It is time to think about all that I have to be grateful for. I have not gambled, I have a roof over my head, food to eat a job I love, although I am finding that a bit too much lately. I have a husband who drives me nuts with his drinking, but he stood by me with my gambling. I have three healthy kids and three healthy grandkids.
I am needing to get my mo jo back and not be so lazy, and by that I mean being a couch potato when I come home by just sitting watching TV and zoning out.
I will take today and be grateful for all that I have. Wishing everyone a “happy gamble free day”

[cat438]

I am sorry that your mother treated you like that Liz. You do not deserve to be treated like that. It is difficult to understand why anyone would do what she did. Does she ever apologize for her behaviour towards you? On the positive side, it is absolutely wonderful that you can now reach out to your daughter and she is supporting you. It is so tough to deal with her behaviour as you felt you were making progress. I think sometimes we have a picture in our head of the type of relationship we want from someone and for some reason it’s not always possible. I can’t imagine treating my daughter that way. One day at a time (((Liz))) I am sure it will help you to talk to your daughter tonight.

[cat438]

We always see the positive in other people and yet we don’t see the positive in ourselves. We have so many wonderful things that we could say about ourselves, but find it tough to say it. I am trying hard to change my thinking about myself. I don’t know where or who said it to me, but I can remember the saying “Self praise is no honour” and for some reason if I say positive things about myself (in my head) that thought always comes to me. It’s funny how we remember the negative things and have no problem repeating them, but the challenge is saying and believing the positives. I did not gamble today. I did something much more positive and spent the day with Carole as she donated Stem Cells to help save someone’s life. I am so thankful to have had that opportunity.

[cat438]

Wow, I am so proud of Carole for donating her stem cells to help someone she doe not know and who could be anywhere in the world. Carole, was so relieved when it was over as she does not like pain, but she went through having two painful needles a day for 4 days. She has really dainty veins so this morning she had to have a catheter inserted so that they could take the blood, which goes into a machine that takes out the stem cells. Her blood was taken out and put back in four times through this machine. They told her that her stem cells were A1 and someone came with their cooler and it will be on a flight tonight!!! What an awesome thing she did. I learned so much today about all that is involved in stem cell donation. Carole was so relieved it was over, as it is stressful to go through procedures like that. I drove her to her mother’s apartment and she was so happy it was over. She has to take it easy for the next few days. She is hoping to be home by the end of the week.
Will keep you posted. Have a great gamble free day!!!

[cat438]

Carole goes tomorrow to do her transplant. She really is being so awesome doing this as she has to go through so much. It really shows what type of person she is that she is willing to do this. I am looking forward to spending the day with her tomorrow. I will be relieved for her when it is all over.
Her mother is doing well and she is probably getting home on Tuesday. Carole will be going back home very soon and she is really looking forward to going home, and she is much better at posting than me.

[cat438]

I was not sure about starting another month, but after your comments I will. It is interesting how although we take it one day at a time that we may not focus on counting days. However, there is something about telling ourselves we got through a month without gambling. I believe any day we get through not gambling is a great day, and some days it is hard to get through one day and we have to break it down to hours and minutes. It is worth it though!!!

[cat438]

Carole’s mother is doing better and does not seem to be confused any more. She has been out of bed and is recovering from the compression fracture of the lower spine. Carole believes that her mother will be in hospital for another 5 to 6 weeks, and that she will likely be able to go back and live in her apartment with lots of home help. Carole is feeling much better about how her mother is doing.
I have to take my hat off to Carole with the bone marrow donation. It is amazing me what she has to go through doing this. She has to have needles for 5 days to help generate her bone marrow. She donates the bone marrow on February 10 so she starts the needles on February 6 as she has the last one on the day of the donation. There can be pain and side effects from these, and also after the donation there are other side effects. I really admire here for doing this as it really is not an easy and painless thing to do. Also when they advise you of all the risks involved it makes you wonder. I am so honoured that I will be with her the day she donates and they take her bone marrow. She still does not have internet. Will keep you posted.

[cat438]

By coming here you have made the first step to a normal gamble free life. The best advice that I can give you is take it one day at a time. I took me a long time to think that way, and I still have to work on it. Every day that you don’t gamble is a good day. Is it possible for you to work things so you don’t have access to cash. I know for a while I bought visa or MC Gift Cards as a way of being able to go out as I could still buy things, but could not get cash from them. Have a wonderful gamble free day!!!

[cat438]

Carole asked me to give you an update as she does not have access to internet at present. Her mother is still in hospital and she will probably be there for a while. The ward she is in now is more for long term patients so she will probably be able to stay there until she gets into a suitable place. She is concerned as her mother is not only dealing with her injury, but seems to be confused about things as well. Carole is staying at her mother’s apartment and she will probably be staying a few months to get everything organized for her mother to move into appropriate accommodation.
Carole could not believe that she has been informed that she is a 9 out of 10 match for the person requiring the bone marrow transplant. The persons health has deteriorated and requires the transplant soon, and I believe she said it was the first week of February. Carole requires medical preparation before they take the bone marrow and they will be starting that next week. She will be doing all this medical “stuff” at a Hospital in Winnipeg where her mother lives.

[cat438]

Sweet Pea, you deserve all the posts from everyone as you are such a special person. I have not been posting for a while and then I get this nice post from you that it gets me back posting. I was getting concerned about you, but glad you are doing okay. I know that sometimes I just come and read the posts to see how everyone is doing, but I don’t have the energy/enthusiasm to post. I know you understand what I mean, but here I am back again thanks to you!!!
Enjoy your morning coffee and sunshine and heat. It is freezing here!!!

[cat438]

Liz I am so happy to hear your news that you got a good offer on your Condo. It really has not taken long for it to sell as it is was only the beginning of January that you put it on the market. I am glad that your Grandson is feeling better. I read one of your earlier posts about letting your daughter be your son’s mother and stepping back. It is wonderful that you were there for him when he needed you and I know you will always be there for him when he needs you, but it is great for you to be his Grandma and love him to bits. I love reading your posts as I find them so uplifting. I know that you have been through so much with the loss of your husband, but you are starting to live again. Your posts about what you are doing whether it is being sore from working out at the gym or weeding your garden have an upbeat feel to them. I am so happy for you and you deserve all the good things that come into your life. Have a great gamble free day!!! Sorry if I am rambling.

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