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Carole you are sounding very positive in your post. I am so glad that you are not procrastinating as I know it will help make you feel better. As the world’s best procrastinator I know if I get started doing things it makes me feel better, but yet I am still procrastinating about those boxes in the basement!!! Good on you for turning over a new leaf in your life. Have you decided what you are going to do when you have to move out your apartment? I am very busy at work right now as we have our largest fundraiser at the end of April. I find that I get more motivated when I have deadlines. The challenge is not leaving to much until the last minute as then I get panicky. I could handle it easier when I was younger, in fact I could handle a lot of things better when I was younger LOL I am so looking forward to the weather being better and they are forecasting +5 this week!!! Have a great evening (((Carole)))
I am sorry that you are having urges and thoughts of gambling. It is interesting when we are in an emotional turmoil we want to run and gamble to escape from it. You are in a difficult situation as you don’t want to do anything to hurt your Grandson and you want to maintain a relationship with him and your daughter. It is difficult as you to have been in a parenting position with your Grandson for a number of years. You have certain guidelines that you follow when parenting and your daughter has a different way of parenting. I wonder if your daughter lets him do what he wants as she is carrying a lot of guilt for not being there for her son as a parent for a number of years. It’s actually easier to just let a child do what they want than discipline them. She may also feel that you are trying to control her if you are telling her how to raise her son. It is a very delicate tight rope that you are walking right now. How is he discipline by his father and other Grandparents? I wonder if you could suggest that you all discuss guidelines on what is acceptable behaviour and how to deal with it. It is better for your Grandson that everyone is consistent with him as he is the one who is getting mixed messages on what is acceptable behaviour. I don’t envy the position that you are in, but it is important to you Grandson that he has the same expectations from everyone in regards to acceptable and unacceptable behaviour. It may be give and take from your daughter and you to come to an agreement. I don’t mean to offend you, and it is so much easier giving advice LOL It is interesting as when we visit our Grandchildren we notice that our son and daughter-in-law tend to let the kids away with things. I am the mother-in-law and I know if I said anything it would be held against me so I just keep my mouth shut!!! I know when we do things with them away from their parents they are better behaved, but then again I think that kids tend to push their parents to the limit. I also know that my son and dil are not consistent with their disciplining which is not a good thing, but I can’t control how they discipline. I know in your situation it is different as you were in the parent position with your Grandson. I know that you will figure out how to work this out Liz. The joys of being a parent never end do they!!!!
Your time away in the cabin sounds absolutely wonderful!!! I am so tired of this winter and cold weather. I am so looking forward to the snow being gone, but there is still so much that it is going to be a while. To think that tomorrow is April 1 and we still have all this snow here. I am finding it surprising at the weekend how I can spend the day at home now and do nothing, and I mean nothing!!!! I need to get on with things in the basement, but I am missing the motivation. I sure wish I could buy motivation, or even if I could bottle it up I could make a fortune selling it LOL I know that I have so much to do and I am not doing anything… I will just keep trying though. I hope you have a great gamble free day (((Carole)))
First of all Liz I can’t understand how your mother would be like that, or any mother for that matter. I thrive on how well my kids are doing even though they are adults. I can’t imagine any mother being jealous of their own child, it seems so unreal to me. I think back to my mother who died so young, she was only 61, and how she went out of her way to help my husband and I when our kids were young and we were struggling. Even when we left Scotland to come to Canada and I know that was difficult for her, she said that “you have to do what’s right for your family now”. I know that she would have given me her last cent if I needed it. As I read the posts about mothers it makes me feel so blessed to have had a mother like I had. She had a heart of gold and would help anyone even if it meant she went without herself. I suppose that is why I find it so hard to hear about all these mothers, who, in my opinion, are not the loving and caring mothers that they should be. They say that as people get old they go back to being a kid again, but if your mother has not been that way before then that’s not the reason!!!
I still miss my Mum and all I have are warm memories of her and what she did for me. I thought all mothers were the same, but I was obviously seeing them as my mother was.
Liz, Ican and Bettie don’t feel guilty about anything, enjoy every day and everything that you have. Have a wonderful trip Liz, you deserve to be pampered and spoiled!!!(((P))) get this tune in your head when the thoughts and urges are there. It will get you focusing on it rather than gambling. I know that when I had really bad urges it helped me to have something else to focus on. Also, when I was feeling those urges I would make sure that I did not have access to cash if I went out. I would buy myself a Visa Gift Card that I could use to buy things, but you could not get cash from it. I would not take my debit card or credit card with me. No money = no gambling !!! Keep fighting those urges (((P))). Remember that feeling you get if you do go on a gambling binge, how hard it is to get back on the recovery train. The urges will be worse if you gamble and how bad you feel about yourself after you gamble… the self loathing, hating ourselves. That will not change P, it will be the same old story… I know I can’t put one dollar in a machine as I can’t stop once I start. I am powerless over it. As we get some gamble free time behind us our memories are not quite as good at remembering how we felt after we gambled. You can do it (((P)))
Life seems to send you continual challenges. I know that this must be very stressful for you and Danny right now. I am praying that you find a job that works for you, and also that Danny gets one as well. It is a stressful time for you again. It seems that you go from one thing to another without a break. You just went through all the stress with your mother and her falls and her being in hospital and you de-cluttering and organizing her apartment to make it safer so that she does not fall. Also, all that stress you went through with the stem cells donation. The needles, the procedure etc that you put yourself through to help someone. I know that you will take it one day at a time as that is the only way to get through this, but I truly feel for you with all that you have gone through and are still going through. You really are a strong lady who will get through this. (((Carole))) you are in my prayers!!!
Hi Liz, I love reading your posts and hearing what you are up to in life in general. You are living a life with purpose, in that you are doing things you want to do. Having breakfast with a dear friend, enjoying being involved in your Grandson’s life, planning a road trip to the spa. It is wonderful to see such positive posts by you. You are finding joy in life and it does not have to be in big things you are doing, just small things like breakfast with a friend, but living in the now. You can tell by your posts that you are taking life and are enjoying whatever you decide to do. You sound very content in your posts. Have a wonderful gamble free day, and a safe trip home!!!
It’s so nice to hear that you are happy not gambling and have managed to beat those urges. So proud of you Sweet Pea!!! You are an inspiration to never give up fighting for a gamble free life. I wish our dear friend “pumpkin” was here as well. I think of her often and pray that she will find her way to recovery.
Enjoy your coffee and give yourself a pat on the back for how far you have come (((P))) Have an awesome gamble free day!!!!I just wanted to let you know that I was thinking of you this morning. I hope that your urges have subsided again. I have had my first cup of coffee so I am feeling somewhat awake. I need to go and get ready for work. It takes a little while to paint on my “happy face” before I leave for work LOL I am working on the positive in my head and counting my blessings. I hope you enjoy a day free of urges and gambling (((P)))