[blueelvis888]

Thank you Sucks,Vera,Velvet and Paul for your replies. Very much appreciated. It makes me wonder how such a disease called GAMBLING has such a hold on such kind ,caring and intelligent people . Gambling does not care what colour you are , how much money you have , were you came from, what job you do, nothing matters to gambling. Apart from taking the last penny you have in your pocket and leaving you in poverty and pain. Is it worth it ?. Just feels to me at this moment of my life that I need to stop gambling as have wasted too much time already. Since gambling I have forgotten how to smile and feel happy. Would one day like to feel happy without the buzz that having a winning day would give me. So sad when the only thing that could make me happy is to win money through gambling. It feels time for me to stop gambling now and take my life back. Do not feel the urge to gamble lately but we have all been there before ?. But I hope with the help of all you people from this site and my willpower. I may have a chance. Thanks again.– 05/01/2012 18:02:26: post edited by blueelvis888.

[blueelvis888]

Hi Everyone , I hope you are all well. Good start to 2012 so far have abstained from gambling for 8 days ! WOW seems like a life time . I wish it had been. Still its never too late to stop gambling. Said that a 1,000 ***** . I was speaking to my partner the other day about quitting gambling and she just said wait until payday and we will see then if you can stop. Good answer. Normally would blow all my months salary within 3 or 4 days of receiving it. But this time something feels different ( Heard that before). Maybe something has changed inside of me.I am fed up of letting people down, fed up of having no money,fed up of having not being able to have nice things, fed up of buying 2nd hand tyres for my 15 year old car,fed up of sleepless nights ,fed up of ***** to everyone, fed up of bank charges,fed up of losing, basically fed up of my whole life. Need to change. If any body has the time to tell me why they gamble , I would love to know that reason as I cannot see why I should gamble anymore ?

— 04/01/2012 18:25:22: post edited by blueelvis888.

[blueelvis888]

Hi Kridel, Life at the moment seems like I am in a set of revolving doors and cannot get out until gambling has taken my last pound. Read your post and I agree with you totally ,I had a week off work over xmas and was really looking forward to it . Season to be jolly apparently , not so easy when you are a CG with time to spare. Lost almost my whole months salary but £100 which does not go too far.I cannot remember the last time I went to the xmas sales as usually my xmas sale is stuck in the bookies , which is very,very expensive and you usually come out with nothing !.Sounds familiar?. Life is very hard when everyone is out enjoying thereselves and having a good time, buying nice things. And I am stuck at home almost penniless contemplating what I could have done if I had not gambled my last pound. Bottom line it was my own fault. Have been gambling over 25 years have lost so much it does not bear thinking about but on the other hand I always do think about it. Why am I living such a poverty stricken life when I could live a nice and comfortable life if I had not gambled. This year I will try to be stronger and take power over this disease which has ruined lives. Do not let it control us any more. We all deserve a gamble free life. Good luck and take care.– 01/01/2012 17:41:26: post edited by blueelvis888.

[blueelvis888]

Hi Lost, never really gambled on football matches ,my choice of poison was Horse racing and greyhound racing. To wait 90 minutes for a football match to finish was way too long for me to wait for an outcome whether I won or lost. Still gambling is gambling and losing is still losing.Whether you wait 90 mins or 1 mins.My craving to gamble is not so strong with me at the moment as I have no funds to gamble with, really not enough money for food ( had to go shopping with my mother so she could buy me some food to eat over the next few days). I have not got the craving, but for some unknown reason I still watch the horse racing on the TV and check all the horse/greyhound results on the internet. Just to see ,if I did have any money to gamble if I would have picked any of the winners. How sad is that. My craving to gamble will never go away ,it has been with me for at least 28 years, it is so very hard to give up. Basically the only way I can deal with it is not straying. If I know my partner is doing over time at work and I know she will not be at home , I may have some time to spare to gamble so usually gamble I do . If I have time to gamble without anybody finding out I usually do. I have promised to family and partner that I have given up gambling for the 1000th time. I am sure every gambler has told that ***. In my case there is no logic of thinking if I am mentally or physically addicted . I just know I am addicted to gambling. It hurts me every second of every day knowing what I have done to my life through gambling.The material things I could have bought, the holidays I could have gone on, time I lost, hurt I have caused there are a million things I could write. But nothing will bring my past back. No amount of worrying will pay the bills and the debt I am in . Have only been on this site a week or so and have enjoyed reading all the positive stories and knowing I am not alone. The only way I can stop gambling is focus on my future and not my evil past. And come on this site for ***** when I want to gamble instead of gambling . Good luck and let us all have a gamble free 2012.– 01/01/2012 10:00:02: post edited by blueelvis888.

[blueelvis888]

Happy New Year Vera + to everyone else. A new year should be a fresh start for us all, a gamble free start. Our gambling past should stay in the past and remain there without a seconds thought. 2012 should be the year we all should give up this HEART BREAKING HABIT, have given it enough of my time and money. That I will hope my cravings will stop. Have to remain positive and strong and not weaken again to this disease. Good luck to everyone and Vera you are such an inspiration to us all.– 01/01/2012 09:01:32: post edited by blueelvis888.

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