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Nem akarok érzéketlennek tűnni, de ha először rád fog fordulni, amikor hibázol vele- nem először követted el ezt a hibát, de most először- akkor talán nem neked való. Nem hangzik túlságosan támogatónak, amikor a zsetonok leestek, és ilyenkor szüksége van rá. Neked is problémád van, mint sok embernek. Mit mondana nekem, ha a barátom kidobna engem emiatt? Folytasd az utat a helyes úton, és tartsd őt a fejedben, mint valami mást, amit elvesztettél a szerencsejáték miatt, de ne büntesd meg magad jobban, mint eddig. Egy kis megértés sokat segít. Sokkal hosszabb, mint egy rúgás a nadrágban, ami úgy tűnik, hogy mindent meg tud osztani veled, miután hibázott.

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Saya tidak bermaksud terdengar tidak peka tetapi jika dia akan membuat Anda marah saat pertama kali Anda melakukan kesalahan dengannya – ini bukan pertama kalinya Anda melakukan kesalahan itu tetapi ini adalah pertama kalinya dengan dia – maka mungkin dia bukan untuk Anda. Dia tidak terdengar begitu mendukung ketika chip sedang turun, dan saat itulah Anda membutuhkannya. Anda memiliki masalah, sama seperti banyak orang. Apa yang akan Anda katakan kepada saya jika pacar saya mencampakkan saya karena ini? Pertahankan perjalanan Anda di jalur yang benar dan simpan dia di benak Anda sebagai hal lain yang telah Anda hilangkan karena berjudi, tetapi jangan menghukum diri Anda lebih dari yang sudah Anda miliki. Sedikit pemahaman berjalan jauh. Jauh lebih lama daripada tendangan di celana yang sepertinya bisa dia bagikan dengan Anda setelah Anda melakukan kesalahan.

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I long for the days of my youth  ( my mid 30s to be exact) where I was home, busy doing, feeling great and free from the dark fog that engulfs me as it does now.  I struggle most with motivation because my treat was to find a site and try a few bucks on a new game for years. I was queen of the no deposit bonus sites and was happy to do that for years. Then I hit a big hit on a small bet that was on a no deposit bonus and I was hooked. It’s been getting worse through the years and online is soooooo hard to avoid in these times. I’m not close to a casino and to get to one is 2 hours one way. I am a single mom and cant really justify being anywhere fot the lengths of time  that it takes to go and play for a while then come back. I tell them that I go once in a while, which is true. I just dont tell them everytime I go. It’s too hard to leave so going in for a couple of hours seems impossible. I guess I am lucky there then. I cant go. I have gamban on most of my devices at home so I cant play on mine……but theres always the kids devices to play on….

I’ve told them not to let me use their stuff because I waste too much time “surfing and goofing” and i hope they will stick to that to limit me. I will try for a one week goal and see how it goes. Enjoy your weekend. Thanks again.

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Take care and good evening(I hope). Are you feeling any better?

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Just joking!!! Hope you fall asleep content and wake up happy knowing you beat back the animals one more day. Dont let others make you feel like drinking because when you do you feel worse which makes you feel lower than they are. Hold upud head high and kniwxthsg you are better this one day and try to be better every day. Hang in there

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Here I go again. Woke up with the energy to take on the world today and I start day two of what I hope will be many. I have a day off in two days and while most people feel relief at the thought of a day to themselves, I am scared to death. My days off are the hardest for me and I need to keep busy all of the Tim’s or I relapse without even a thought. I am realizing all of my mistakes and keep hoping that i will correct and then come to a day when there are no more slips. Having to confess here is the only time I really have to face myself and what I do. Here is to day two, which should be an easy one because I am occupied from sun up to sun down. Lord, give me strength over the long weekend.

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I have read through your thread and am reading the same story over and over. You feel great when you dont and horrible when you do. How do you feel while your doing it? Is your heart racing when you place your bet? Does it skip a beat when you see the card/number / symbol come up? Do you feel elation when the result is a win? I am a slot junky. Literally. I am an addict. I cant stand casinos longer than an hour or so ( too many people and too much noise) so I play online. Bad idea. But my point is the feeling you get when you are gambling. I get such a high when I get the three bonus symbols. It’s the greatest feeling. I dream of them. I hear the music that they play in the bonus rounds in my sleep. Its that that is hard to kick. I’ve grown numb to the amount in my account while I play. A larger amount just means that I can play longer. I even play on sites where I know it will be impossible to cash out due to deposit and withdrawal restrictions. It’s not the money. Its sounds like it is the same for you. I wish that I could be one of the people that goes in and wins a bit and leaves up. I seem to be very lucky and win frequently. The problem is that I cant seem to leave until its all gone. All of it. And I need to have maxed out all of my withdrawal methods at my bank too. I am chasing a feeling. Seems you are too and that’s why you go back. You aren’t chasing the money because you feel the regret of losing. You want back the feeling of winning. If you never leave with anything then there are no winnings to chase. Deal with this the same way you would a substance addiction because if you are dealing with a biochemical response then you need to deal with it in the same way they deal with alcohol or drug addiction. Your brain is releasing happy chemicals when you play and win.You are addicted to that happy chemical. You cannot do it a little. It just will not happen. If you go then you will lose. Period. Dont let yourself be fooled into thinking that you will ever win. Find out what your triggers are. Avoid them. Cut off your financial support. No more credit cards for me. Restrict your line of credit to a manageable amount. Put money earned into a savings account that you cant access with your bank card. Make it hard until you feel you really have it under control. If you were an alcoholic I’m sure you wouldn’t work in a bar and have access to alcohol all of the time an quit successfully. People suffer from all kinds of addiction. Look up the stats. Dont feel defeated. Find the strength that others too must find to dig themselves out and get on with living. Stop regretting the past because that’s keeping gambling in your mind all of the time. Free yourself and start living again.

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GREAT JOB! Every day that you dont gamble or drink will make it easier to break the cycle. You didn’t get into this mess all at once so it will take time to get out. Make a calendar with a weekly goal to start and cross off each day as you finish. Make it visible that you have done something as well as NOT done something. Everyday that I wake I know from the instant I open my eyes if I have done well the day before. If not, I don’t want to get up. I dont want to face the day. If I have, like today, then I am up and ready to face the day with life and hope. Dont always make this about what you’re not doing but make this about what you have done – treated yourself with love and respect and stopped the cycle for one more day. Keep strong and we wait to hear about your new day.

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Have you checked the online avaialablity for aa? I looked up aa online and they do have help available for those who are not able to make meetings. Please check and see what’s available for you and utilize what’s at your disposal to help yourself out. 

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Just checking in. How is it going? Its the start of day 3 for me too. Here is to being each others check in

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  To tell you the truth, the last week has been bad. I was home for most of the week and was the largest lump you’ve ever seen. I have lots to do but my mind just wont release me. I’m in a fog. I watch gambling videos on YouTube. I want to play. And then I did.  I am happy to report  that the bouts did lot last long before I would self exclude, but it was enough to disappoint myself. I didn’t even want to wake up.in the morning knowing how easily i failed the day before and then I saw a movie that touched a part of me that I cannot explain. I am not a religious woman on the exterior, but have a strong belief in  a diety that guides our destiny. I watched a movie that had as its core the idea that all men and women are born equal. All good. There exists beings on the earth that are either from heaven or hell and they try to influence individuals one way or the other. I have been feeling like there is something that is controlling me. I dont really want to gamble most times.  Hate the thought of it at the best of times. But there is something that makes me pick up the computer. Absent minded. Almost possessed. I cant stop myself even though I really dont want to do it. Dont get me wrong. I  dont think that there is a demon making me do it, but there is something coercing me. It’s from inside me and I need to find out why. I believe in the self harm we all talk about. I am harming myself. It’s hard to say. Hard to understand. 

   I understand about your feelings regarding the employment situation. I feel that I would be in the same state as you given your situation and hope that there is a resolution in your near future. It can be a great source of pride but can also be a great source of aggravation as well. I can honestly say that had my employment not gone so horribly off track 5 years ago I never would have started gambling in the first place. Perhaps it’s best if you heal yourself so that you are the best person  you can  be for when the situation changes in your favor? 

  Hope the weekend works out to be a great mothers day for you.

 

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Hope you stay strong and are well. Keep posting and continue with your journey.

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The alcohol you will need help with. The physical manifestations when you try to quit will be hard and you are more likely to relapse. Is there no one that you can go to for the alcoholism?Perhaps while addressing this you will uncover more of why you gamble as well. Dont try to go it alone. So many people suffer from this and there are so many options out there for you. I will try to be here to hear your thoughts but I am not qualified to help you. Running girl was right about just not quitting. You have to do more. You have to replace the activity with something else and in the process make yourself a better person. Of those things you can be proud and I  pride you will find your strength. Find what you can do to make yourself proud of you and replace the self loathing with something  much more worthy.

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I think it is self defeating to call these problems we have as stupidity. We are human. We have chemical and physiological responses that we sometimes cannot control. The issue is finding the ways that we can control it and seeking them out. You need to find a way to rescue yourself from the alcohol before it physically kills you and the cg before it financially wipes you out. I meant to give you hope when I spoke of other addictions as people recover from those and live their lives in recovery happy and aware of their limitations. We can too and we must. We just cant gamble. I often watch shows of people that are morbidly obese and think “why cant thry just stop eating”? Same as us. Why cant we just stop? WE NEED TO STOP. I NEED TO STOP. YOU NEED TO STOP. YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT.  What more is there to say. Approach this like your life depends on it

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I’ve watched my family member battle with an opioid addiction and lose his friends to overdoses. The heartache and loss is mind numbing. I too an an addict but I am addicted to online slots . I can quietly lose everything I have and no one will be the wiser. Try living with someone who is an alcoholic and you will have a different opinion of your situation. It is hard but you can rise above it. You have the strength deep within you you just have to find what switches the light on in your soul to stop you from hurting yourself. You say God bless. Look to your faith for answers.

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