[andy84]

Being busy in work helps. Gambling still on the mind for the rare moments that I have time to think. Home now, another day done…

[andy84]

Thanks so much brave68 for the post. I feel like you understand my predicament. My problem gambling is online, as it doesn’t ‘feel’ like real money. In the bookies, I could gamble £10 a weekend and not feel any guilt. The online gambling is my huge problem.

I don’t really want to include family in my problem, as when it was last mentioned, it almost caused world war 3! I just need the control over my life again. I’m still at the stage where I’m watching football and thinking who I fancy to win etc and thinking about bets. Ive just watched my football team on sky and watching the second game now, so taking it game by game is a start.

I work long hours in a professional position, so my time is pretty much taken up and I put 100% effort into my work too. I work with a laptop though and the urge is always there, although now I have NO way of accessing any online betting sites.

I need to save to move out into a new house, but simply don’t have the patience to save and have been simply falling into oblivion, believing a big win would help me on my way. A clear delusion. My eventual plan is to cancel my overdraft, to always be in positive credit.

I don’t want to touch meds, but I know at the same time that I have an extremely difficult road ahead. Compulsion is the correct word. I’m in a dark place at the moment, but know that I can break away from it.

Thanks very much.

[andy84]

Day one

Woke up thinking about my financial ruin. My need to sort my life out. Keeping it to myself at the min. My family don’t understand the addiction. This is my councilling.

Got out and ran 7 miles. Got a marathon to train for next April, which will take my time up. Being mad busy in work also helps, but there is always a niggling doubt at the back of my mind, that my next bet is only around the corner.

I have no credit cards and I’m going to ring for a new debit card this week, so that I don’t know the number. I will ask family members to hold the card for me too. Day one of the rest if my life. I do crave a bet, but I’m putting those feelings yo one side.

Thanks for your support.

[andy84]

On the road to recovery/hope /safety? I have lived the experience in your message for far too long. Thank you for putting it in black and white for me.

I hope writing this blog will help motivate me. Need it desperately…

[Author]

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