[AddickT]

Hi all,

Today is day 11 since I last had a bet. Thanks for the replies to my initial post. It’s nice to know people are reading.

I spoke with my girlfriend, she was supportive and has told me she will support me in any way she can. This was the best possible outcome I could have hope for – yet it still doesn’t feel me with a sense of happiness, maybe because I wish I didn’t have to face up to the reality of it all?

Since “coming clean” to those close to me, I’ve felt myself becoming more and more down. I’m not sure why, if anything I should use the support I’ve got as a springboard to help me – instead I feel guilt, shame and low self confidence. Has anyone else felt this after letting it all out in the open?
I’m sure it isn’t helped by being in a stressful job that I do not really enjoy, on top of the pressure of completing a part-time University course paid for by my employer, it all just feels a little bit too much but I’ll get there.

On Thursday I attempted a GA meeting. I say the word attempted because I drove into the car park and straight back out again! At this point I hadn’t told my girlfriend, so I told myself if I wasn’t going to the meeting, I had to go and tell her instead.

To end this entry positively I’ve decided this Thursday I am going to the GA meeting local to me. Will it help? Who knows. It’s certainly better than sitting at home wasting £’s on online betting websites?!

AddickT

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