[wrkshoez]

Hey all,

So, long story short, I have been gambling in one way or another since I was about 18. I’m 34 now. Gambling has basically destroyed my life. I still live at home because I can never save enough money to do anything. I am fortunate ti have the money I do (and I’m sorry to sound morbid or callous) because I have wealthy relatives and collect some inheritance when they pass. My job pays me next to nothing and I don’t look for others because I am convinced that the best way to go about things will be to strike it rich… or something. I don’t even know anymore. I wandered in on crypto right before the last boom happened and actually managed to do ok, pulled out with enough runway before it crashed down. But now its like I have to give that money back. $600 in DFS. down the drain. $1000 on some dumb crypto casino I found. Yep. Oh, I know! I’ll do meme stocks! nope. On the last point that hasn’t gotten too bad yet. I managed to pull out of one losing only $70 and tomorrow I will take out the rest. ($4,000 total). It should come to a few hundred dollars lost when all comes to pass.

I set up that preface to ask if any of you have advice on how to get it to leave your brain. Like, for example, I want to leave stocks, or not gamble at all, but my brain always chimes in “what if it goes up like gamestop!” or “what if you create the winning lineup this time!” The idea that if I don’t do it it would have resulted in me hitting it big, becoming rich. etc. I can’t stop thinking about it. All told. I’ve probably lost 10- 15k gambling in life. That may not seem like a lot but for someone who has never had a real job or finances, it could’ve meant the difference between saving money and leaving home and…. not. Or having the motivation to find a job or… who knows what else.

I’m sorry this is probably rambling and I don’t actually know what tone I’m conveying here, so I apologize if it comes off as anything other than a request for ideas. I want to not want to do this anymore. Is that possible? Thanks for reading.

[G Rec]

Hi wrkshoez,

Welcome to the forum and well done on taking a positive step.

First, you are not alone in the situation you find yourself in and the feelings, I can relate to almost everything you have written, and I expect many others on this forum can do.

As a next step, I would strongly recommend attending one of the New Members Groups, there is one on tonight (19:00 UK time) , and you can get some great advice/tips from Charles on further positive next steps to take. These groups generally have lower numbers attending allowing Charles to give specific advice for your situation, I found this group very useful when I first joined the forum.

You asked ” I want to not want to do this anymore. Is that possible?”. From my experience, in the early days of recovery, there are going to be periods where you are fully determined to never gamble again, but then also periods where the urges to gamble are really strong. To help with this, you want to place as many barriers in place during the periods of non-gambling determination that you can (again the New Members Group will help identify good barriers you can put in place) , this will make it more difficult to gamble when urges do occur giving you more time to think through your actions, and making it more likely that you will be able to resist that urge.

As you stay gamble free for longer and longer, these urges to gamble will still pop up from time to time, but they will generally get less frequent, less intense, and become more manageable.

[Author]

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