[brian19]

Hi all,
I have gambled regularly for 15 years. I have maintained a level of control over it in recent years although when I lived alone (2000-2009) I frequently gambled all of my wages. In recent years I have gambled online (sports) and have probably lost around £1000 a year (ballpark figure) which accounts for my £4000 credit card debt. I know this is not huge debt but it is a constant reminder of wasted time and hard earned money spent on gambling.
Two weeks before Christmas in a fit of frustration after losing £1000 (over a few days) I transferred £3000 from my credit card into my betting account and placed it on a 1/2 double which won by the skin of its teeth. I recouped my loss plus an extra £500 to play with and all was well again in my world. Had this bet lost my future would have been affected greatly. My debt would have doubled. I have recently bought a house with my girlfriend and I would baulk at spending £50 on paint etc to decorate our home but be happy to sneak upstairs and transfer thousanda to my account to recoup a loss. I don’t like what I have become.
I write today as I have completely disgusted myself. I lost £400 last night and as a result have put myself £300 into overdraft when I was in a good position with some money left over til payday and looking forward to saving and paying off my 4k.
I’m just really disgusted that I did that and feel like I am letting my girlfriend down by focusing on gambling instead of our future.
I immediately self excluded from said account and have self excluded from pretty much every other online bookie in the past.
I know 4k plus 300 quid overdraft isn’t huge but I hate myself because I am responsible for it.
I joined this site today because if I am to put gambling in the past I need to try something new and hopefully this will help.
It’s now the early hours of Wed morning and this is my first day free of gambling.
I look forward to speaking to you all on here.

[Anonymous]

Many here have been when you are – some are still there. Your story reminds me of some of mine – I would place a bet trying to double up and catch up with losses. On the occasions I would win, I would only pay back some of the money borrowed – with the other money I would try and chase more of my losses. It always ended up with my loosing the money I had one plus much more trying to recovery those looses.

I just kept digging myself into a deeper into the hole. The only way to get out is to stop digging. Coming here is the start for you… one day gambling free – keep dling that one day at a time.

Stay strong!!

Lee

[monique]

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Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our
privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

[monique]

It is now the end of Weds (at least where I am) and I hope you have had a good day – a gambling-free day. You are right that it is usually essential to find support to bring to reality your hopes of a gambling-free life. You are taking sensible action by excluding yourself and setting up barriers to protect you from gambling. Now here you can be part of a community of people with similar goals. You can read the experiences of others, share more of your own and also join in the ‘live’ Support Groups.
Do write more of your story, what is difficult for you, what has helped you etc.
Best wishes,

Monique

[Author]

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