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Hi All Im just gonna go by D on here.
Im 23 YO from johannesburg , South Africa.I basically grew up in casino’s waiting for my parents at the Arcade playing games etc. I use to play professional rugby and then when rugbt stopped i always stayed in tip top shape physically. Always extremely healthy and fit.
In 2013/ 2014 I played slot machines with my uncle (super wealthy and responsible). It was a cracking year and we took close to over 1/2 million rand from casinos in SA. He then gave me as we won , i never use to take any money out my pocket. I used money to libe etc as i didnt earn much yet. He took a break in 2015 / 2016 from gambling.
In 2016 i started sports betting in forms of multiples and then larger singles. I had some great wins and cash outs etc then in 2017 it got out of hand. Betting way more than I can afford to lose, taking out credit cards, loans etc.
Ive been trying to stop but it just last a few days then I made a plan with money again. I still see my uncle, we olay tables together nowadays. He still doesnt expect any money from me . Win or lose and when we win he gives me a cut. Which a waste on sports betting hours later!!!!!!!!
In december i got a fat bonus and pay etc etc and been good with money until a few days ago went like 15K up and then lost it all and deposited and lost even more.
My dad was a alcoholic and drank his life away, he doesnt drink anymore but now a very sickly man (47)
My mom (55)is my rock. She always helps where she cans she doesnt know how much money i waste though.
My girlfriend of 5 years is just as amazing but she also doesnt know how i bet money etc.
I find it very hard spending money buying something or spending money on anything but betting. But when it comes to betting i could deposit 5K like nothing. Im missing my whole beautiful young life as im always on my phone placing bets and checking scores.
I want to train again, be healty, play some rugby while im still young but im always negative and depressed as I lose ALWAYS. Im not the type of person that goes and jogs off a 10k loss. I get quiet and it affects everyone around me.
Please give me advise, help?
Thanks in advance.
D
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I only arrived here yesterday, i suppose the first step to recovery is admitting the problem and arriving at places like here. Talking, listening, reading. Ive recognised over the last 24, the biggest trigger for me is boredom, or between the months of Oct and March. I go fishing most of the year apart from those months and ot keeps me busy, focussed and distracted from gambling. It sounds like getting back into Rugby could be a part of salvation for you.
Good luck, keep positive, and keep posting. For what its worth, i will be looking in and reading your posts
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Hello D and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums
Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!
Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.
As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)
And on that note….
I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂
Take care
The Gambling Therapy Team
PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!
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Well done D12- we all know how difficult that first 24 hour are so congratulations .
Keep strong – one day at a time -
Hi D,
Well done on looking for help.
First the bad news – it is a GAMBLING addiction. Whilst it is the online sports betting that has brought you here you will find it very difficult to stop doing this while still visiting the casinos with your uncle. If you continue gambling with your uncle then even if you manage to stop the online betting the addiction is more than likely to just switch to another form of gambling.
Now the good news, you can stop gambling. Read the other stories here – you will see the sort of things that have helped others, you can apply them to your own situation.
How else can you fill your time?
It will help if you are honest with those around you – your uncle needs to know you have decided to stop. Your mum or girlfriend could help with accountability. You already say that your mood swings effect those around you – if they don’t know about your gambling then they probably know there is something wrong anyway.
Keep posting.
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On your gamble free days, that`s a great achievement.
Keep the run going, you can do this
DCH
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Hi D12,
Well done on your gamble free time .
I think you have misunderstood Charles’ point…I think Charles is saying you need to cut out all gambling as any type of gambling keeps the addiction alive …not gradually stop going to the casino with your uncle .In truth none of us on here want to stop gambling …we just can No longer face the consequences of gambling in our lives.
Well done on telling your mum. It is so good that she is looking after your finances.
Well done also on your gamble free time . -
IDI
I agree with you that none of us want to stop….we to HAVE stop. Even with the occasional, or even prolonged responsible gambling, there will be the inevitable blow up which will bring us back to the pain we hope to stop. Even simple minimal losses add up to be huge amounts of money. Casinos have made billions on little losses. Look at penny slots, seem harmless enough, but “affordable losses” become huge gains for the bookmakers. The big winners (betting big because of our issues) always lose even bigger.
The only true winner is someone who doesn’t play. I want to be a winner, but I sure miss playing. -
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Well done d12- keep up the momentum and enjoy spending that money on you!
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