[Anonymous1]

Hi, i’d like to share my story with everyone here.  I have made major changes to my lifestyle due to gambling and I would like to share the ups and downs.  Everything must come to an end at some point and I have reached that point. 

First, I started off back in 2011 making a small bet on a slot machine when we went to visit one of my best friend’s friends and celebrate him starting there.  I only put in $5 and did not win anything, but the anticipation spin got me excited and I felt the need to get more money ot try again,.

That alone should have told me that I would have a problem, but little did I know how it would evolve.  I worked minimal hours at the time and did not make much more than minimum wage so I was an extremely frugal person.  As time went on, I found myself going more and more

often and always alone.  After a few months of hitting some small things, I won $800 on my last $10 of the $40 i brought with me.  Thats when the trouble began.

Fastforward a few year to 2015 I started a new full time job and started making a lot more $ (at least to me).  I found myself going to the casino once every few weeks.  At the end of the year i had a net loss of $4800 on my win loss statement and I remember the anger I felt and swore

I would never go back.  I was succesful for a few months but then I fell back into it and started playing more money as I had more since I had not lost it.  End of 2016 rolled around and I had a negative loss of 11k.  I had never had a handpay and again I said never again.

First of the year in 2017 I went and finally had my first jackpot.  That was the worst thing that could have ever happened.  After that the bets started to get bigger and bigger.  I managed four jackpots totaling 11,000 but my net win loss was $-18,000+.

By the start of this year I was having extreme financial difficulties.  Having lost so much money constantly I had 4 maxed out credit cards and rent and other bills to pay that is extremely stressful when you work on commission.  I was in the negative off the base pay every month and

did not have enough $ just to cover the payments.  I can vividly remember tricks like paying off a dollar on a credit card so you can abuse it and use it to fill up a tank of gas and deal with the overage payment later.  Living like that is not sustainable.  I constantly had suicidal thoughts

and wondered if there was anything I could do.  With that much stress, I managed to make more and more sales and have been making 2000+ commission every much net, but I just kept blowing it thinking I need more.  Eventually, after an entire afternoon of thinking about ending it all after

I had lost $5000 that I did not even have in my account, I reached out and finally came clean to my family.  While they were extremely disapointed, they understood and helped me organize a bank account that they would control and paid off all my other accounts.  This was supposed to be the end.

Unfortunately, the past few months the monster crept back.  There is no worse thing than good credit and a gambling problem.  Utilizing my line of credit, I took out a few hundred and hit on everything I touched.  In one day, I left the casino with over $16,000 in cash. You all know what a compulsive

gambler does with that money though.  Within one week, I had blown it all back.  Today, I set myself $6,000 in the negative on my credit accounts.  While playing, my host came over and I asked her to look up my win loss.  She tried her best to sugarcoat it (as it is there job to keep high-rollers playing)

and said “well your return percentage is 95% so you are doing better than everyone else!”  Realistically, that is $660,000 of coin in on machines in this year alone with $50 being the minimum spin amount played.  I have over 100K in W2g’s and my net winnings for the year is -30k+.  

As I continued to sit there and lose, I thought to myself about this situation and remembered everything and my history with gambling.  $30k is almost as much as I net in a year at a decent wage.  For this reason I am here, sharing you my stories and woes, and hoping you listen.  

All I can do is ask for your support.

[finding_laura]

For a compulsive gambler, one bet is too many and a thousand is never enough.

As Jappy says, we will never get out of the hole we are creating if we don’t first stop digging.

How are you planning on hiding the payments on that kind of debt from your parents?

Counseling may be helpful to address this. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy which helps change thought processes can be a helpful part of that.

A support system such as gambler’s anonymous or church group can be helpful as well.

We didn’t chose to have this addiction. Most of us weren’t even aware such a thing existed.

As hard and difficult as it feels right now, you can have a better life, a gamble free life with the things in that make life truly meaningful. It takes courage to admit you have a problem and do the things necessary to deal with it. As much as people let on they don’t have problems most do. My mother often tells me how proud she is of me and that I took the bull by the horns and dealt with it. I was very low when I finally admitted my problem. But I did the things suggested to me here finally. And they made a world of difference.

Can you ban from the casino you frequent? Or are you in a location where this can’t happen.

Please don’t give up hope.

Laura

[alice]

Casinos were also one of my main poisons. I self excluded from my local casinos which certainly helped the immediate problem but as Laura has touched on its not the whole answer. There is a change of the way we think and cope with events and feelings needing to happen before a problem with gambling can really be sorted. You need a three printed attack – prevent access to gambling facilities, prevent access to financial resources to gamble with and then some kind of therapy support to help with the psychological side of things!

[Author]

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