[Jrosey]

Here I am again. I made a post a while ago titled I’ve lost everything..  So much in my life has changed. Before I made that first post I had lost my entire life savings, and felt like I was at rock bottom.  Since then I have gotten engaged, rebuilt my saving’s and have bought a house with my fiancée. I was gambling free for almost 2 years. 

While my house was being built my accounts were being watched by my mortgage lender, which completely controlled me knowing that if I lost a large amount of money or made a large purchase that I could lose my approval for a home loan. Since I’ve owned my home I have found myself traveling down the same path I was in the past.  I have gambled as much as I was before with the exact same outcome, but I  just keep finding myself in a bar going behind the love of my life’s back gambling away our money.  The worst part of it all is that I know that I have a problem, hate myself while I’m gambling, and just want to stop. I have never felt more content in my life, outside of the gambling, but whether I am happy or sad a piece of me just feels like I need to gamble, and when I lose that part becomes stronger, wanting to win it back to help me forgive myself.

Luckilly/Unluckily I live in Las Vegas where gambling in everywhere, but due to regulations I Have to go to a bar/casino to gamble, as it blocked on all websites.  I just need some help. I have already confided in my family, but have not confided in my fiancee after our last fight, because I am so scared to lose her..

[velvet]

Hello J and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

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