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    • #42854
      Doofus11
      Participant

      Hi guys new to here and first ever post. Don’t really know what to say.

      Been gambling for around 5 years won 20k when I was far too young and that’s what sucked me in. That money has now long gone and I’m around £15k in debt with loans and overdrafts. Paying all my loans on time but any other money I have I’m using to bet to try chase what I have lost. Iv shut down my accounts this week. Just after any advice and tips to keep the mind occupied. I seem to bet more when I’m bored and don’t even enjoy it anymore just trying to get back what I have lost. Hoping to start a clean slate from today.

    • #42855
      finding_laura
      Participant

      Hey guy (don’t feel comfortable calling you a doofus!) welcome to the forum. We all feel like a doofus, and often much worse because of this addiction. This addiction can drive us to very dark places! I’m glad to see you trying to get a handle on this at such a young age. So many of us here have wasted years and decades gambling. Closing down your accounts is a good step. Putting in place barriers so that you don’t have access to gamble, finding new things to do to fill your time, working out, walking, running, volunteering, join a social club, etc. can help. Some sort of accountability can also help tremendously. I had a family member that I trusted help me with my money so that i wasn’t allowed total unaccountable access. Use the support you will get here from other members. They may have some specific advice for you re sports also. Take care and welcome to the Forum.

    • #42856
      charles
      Moderator

      Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

      Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

      Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

      As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

      And on that note….

      I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

      Take care

      The Gambling Therapy Team

      PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

    • #42857
      menez02
      Participant

      Hey mate, how are you ? How are your feeling and mindset right now ?

    • #42858
      Doofus11
      Participant

      Sorry menez02 iv only just seen your comment. Will have to opt in for the email replies next time. I’m new to this app. I’m feeling very low. Although iv shut down my accounts I’m finding time to go into bookies now instead. Only my partner knows my situation but she doesn’t know the full extent of my problem. I feel ashamed and embarrassed!! Also do you know of a website I can go on to self exclude from bookmakers? Or do I have to ring?

    • #42859
      Doofus11
      Participant

      Sorry Laura only just seen your comment. I need lots of barriers and am thinking about changing my weekly pay to go into my partners account instead of mine. I really want to succeed in doing this but am finding it very hard

    • #42861
      Anonymous
      Guest

      Self Exclusion

      Will help you exclude from all bookies in any specific area, you can add more areas/shops as you go along.

    • #42862
      Doofus11
      Participant

      I phoned up and self exclude just now guys from the bookies in my area. The women was lovely on the phone. Been that busy in work that I had no urges today and it’s pay day which I would normally see me blow half of it straight away on bets. Feeling positive and motivated today

    • #42864
      Doofus11
      Participant

      Day 3 completed!! I haven’t not bet on the weekend in years. Feeling really proud of myself. Even managed to tell my best friend about my problem (should’ve told him sooner). He’s One of those friend where no matter what’s wrong he’ll always be there to help. Going to get back into the gym tomorrow try and keep my mind active and busy.

    • #42865
      alliesmum
      Participant

      Way to go D!
      I find being honest and telling people your ‘problems’ is a very hard thing to do but you have done it and you probably feel like a weight has been lifted.
      I always try to be honest no matter what the situation or what I’ve done. If I don’t be honest I find that my brain goes to jelly and I get stuck within my own thoughts. Honesty is the hardest thing and you’ve done it my friend.
      At least now your friend knows and will be there for you throughout your journey. We all need someone to talk to and confide in, especially when things get tough.

      Anyways congrats on day 3!
      Hope you have a great day and stay gamble free!
      Lots of love xxx

    • #42867
      Doofus11
      Participant

      Tonight marks 7 days gamble free. A whole week!!!! I can’t believe iv actually come this far. Since I self excluded I haven’t even wanted to bet (mainly cause I’d have to travel 10+miles even if I wanted to) and I don’t want to let my partner or my friend down. I can see a light at the end of the tunnel it’s still far away but definitely achievable!! Still staying positive 🙂

    • #42868
      i-did-it
      Participant

      Well done DOofus ,
      Seven days is fabulous .
      I admire the action you have taken in closing accounts and self banning.
      If you can do seven days you can do anything .

      Keep strong and keep posting

    • #42869
      Doofus11
      Participant

      9 days gamble free and 2 full weekends complete. Had big urges to bet on Friday when I received a “tip” but I stayed strong. The horse didn’t win eather so that made me feel even better that I stayed strong. Really starting to feel like iv got my plan together now. This weekend I would’ve paid off all the bills I’m behind on so will be fully court up and can concentrate the money I’m saving on a little treat for me or my partner for being so understanding about everything’s that’s happened. Starting the week on a positive note 🙂

    • #42870
      charles
      Moderator

      Well done on not gambling.

      I have another tip for you – don’t listen to tips!! 🙂 I would recommend telling anyone you used to gamble with, or who are likely to give you “tips” etc that you have decided to stop gambling. A couple of “I’m not interested” and those gambling conversations usually dry up.

      Also I would recommend not checking the results – how would you have felt if that tip had won?

      Well done on your gamble free time.

    • #42871
      Johnny B
      Participant

      I agree with Charles.. For myself checking payouts always makes me want to play again.. I always think I could be hitting those winners.. but never do. Even if I did, I would lose it all back again and then some..
      Good luck on your journey. One day at a time!

    • #42873
      Doofus11
      Participant

      Today marks 23 days gamble free!!!!!
      I can now actually get paid on a Friday and still have money the following Friday where as before all of it would be gone by the Sunday evening. I’m finding myself less interested in sports now because I’m not betting on them. Me and my partner are having a lot better relationship (less arguing) because I’m not in a mood now because I haven’t lost. Wish I owned up to my problem sooner

    • #42874
      velvet
      Moderator

      Hi D
      Don’t waste time wishing you had done something different; you cannot change what has gone before. Today you are gamble-free and your life sounds good – well done.
      Velvet

    • #42875
      i-did-it
      Participant

      Great post Doofus – there is life after gambling and it’s a good life
      Keep posting

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