[ernest88]

Hello, I started gambling 4years ago, that was during my final year in the university, in the beginning I only gambled small amounts such as 10k per week, but that became 20k twice a week for I was working & I was a students Union leader, (SENATOR & CLERK) and for the past years I have topped the maximum amount I can go. I have been gambling up to 40 to 50k per day in most sessions and I would get mad when I don’t win.. I had a really large win around 7 months ago and I was on top of the world. I had won 150k, I cashed it out and made a pledge to myself that I wasn’t going to gamble any more since this is the highest amount of money I have held at one time. I am 32 years old now and a gambling addict. Within just a week after winning that amount I had nothing. I maximised my overdrafts trying to get that feeling again. I have lost everything I had, including my integrity and name, my relationships as I write this I don’t have a phone of my own or job, l and father no longer talk as a result of this habit,I have not been sincere and honest with people any longer as I don’t keep promises any longer.
I am so scared, scared of how much this is effecting me and how it could potentially ruin my future. I just can’t seem to stop. After NYSC I got a new job as a school principal that was paying me relatively well but couldn’t stay long in it because all my money went on gambling and I even missappropraited funds and I lost the job two months ago, which am still in depted to my employer.I have been betting literally every penny that comes my way so I never have had the chance to get out my debts. I have Dept of up to 200k as a result of this.
I have really upset myself and let myself down and I am almost right back at the start.I am out of work but I have been gambling all of the money people gift to me, so I just never see the money. I don’t know what to do, I don’t want to do it again. I almost took my life (SUCIDE)on 9th July, but a thought came that there is a way out of the mess, I need HELP. So I have decided to speak out.
I am fully aware I’m addicted and Iam willing to take every precaution I can think of and find to stop gambling.
I want to change, right now for good before I waste any more of my life. If I can stop , realistically I could get out my debts within a few months of working hard. I just wanted to write this massage as a milestone that gambling is now my past by the grace of God.. I will be honest that I don’t convince myself but I really have to try. Gambling is loosing, it brings ill luck among others and I don’t feel sorry for myself, I’m angry at myself for always failing. Am in tears writing this to you.
I look forward to making a change and wish you be part of this hard step out of my addiction and show me the love you can.

[G Rec]

Hi ernest88,

Welcome to the forum, well done on acknowledging your problem, and taking a positive step.

As Dunc mentioned, there are new member’s groups on Mondays and Thursdays that you may find useful. I found them especially helpful when I first joined the forum, there tend to be low numbers in these meetings which allows Charles who runs them to provide some more specific advice applicable to each member’s own situation.

I look forward to following your progress on here, and perhaps seeing you in one of the groups.

[Author]

Posts