[charles]

I know the  Christmas period can be hard for some, it can put a lot of pressure on people and cause a lot of stress – and that’s for the general population not just Compulsive Gamblers and their families!

 For me though Christmas is massive in my recovery; it really highlights the difference between how things are now and how things were when I gambled.

 When I was gambling I was single and would be staying at my mums, either because I was unemployed or because I had a few days off work over Christmas.  Presents would depend on how my luck was running in the run up to Christmas – most years that meant cheap chocolates and socks for my loved ones!  All bought on Christmas Eve of course.

We would usually have Christmas lunch at my brother’s house.  While dinner was in the oven a lot of us would pop down the pub for a drink.  In those days of course I had what could be described as a “convenient bladder” – I had to nip to the loo any time it looked like a round of drinks needed buying!

 Then it would be lunch, all the family sat around the table.  All of them knowing that I was in the **** and all of them knowing I would be planning to have a big punt the next day to try and get myself out of it. My mum would be worried sick. The rest of my family would be avoiding the subject, trying to get through the day without an argument or upsetting mum.  I would be just sat there wondering what the problem was – after all I was going to win a fortune the next day wasn’t I?  In reality, no.   On the odd occasion that I did manage to win my way out of a hole then I’d just start digging another hole, after all I’m a Compulsive gambler, it’s what we do.

 THIS Christmas.  Well I will be at my brother’s again, nowadays it’s with my wife and dog.   Most of the presents are already bought, the rest soon will be.  Nothing expensive but thought has gone into them.  We are staying a few days so no doubt we will pop down to the pub at some stage.  These days my bladder really is getting worse lol but I will be first to the bar to buy a round.

 There will be less of us sat at the Christmas table,   There will be lots of food, knowing my sister in law she will have catered for triple the numbers, and plenty of drinks, for those that do (I don’t).  We will then play some silly games, charades probably, a giant game of Jenga, that’s sort of stuff.  Games that kids from 5 to 85 can enjoy.

 I’m not religious so to sum it up Christmas for me now is what it should always have been – a time when most of the family aren’t working and can get together at the same time.

 Boxing Day, in the past a big day in my gambling year.  My brother will have a bet, no reason why he shouldn’t as he isn’t an addict, good luck to him.  He does know not to discuss his bets with me though, nor will he tell me about his wins/losses.

 I already have my Boxing Day planned.  More food!  I will get up early and take my dog for a walk, later my wife and I will also take her down to the beach for a couple of hours – she loves it running around with other dogs and chasing the seagulls.  I love watching her and by then I will definitely need the exercise (all that food lol)  I will time my trip to the beach for when my brother will be watching his races and return to join him watching a football match later.  If he has a bet on that match then I won’t know about it.

 The day after Boxing Day we will be driving home.  Probably with some of the left over food in the car!  New years Eve we are goinmg to a dog friendly hotel in an area where there are no fireworks.  It’s a great place, we have been before.

 Did you spot the difference between now and then?  Not difficult.  Which is why Christmas is so big in my recovery.

 If you are new here and/or struggling well you can get a lot of support here and elsewhere.  There is no magic wand though and it’s a week till Christmas.  Likely it’s not going to be a good one.  What you do now though will determine how future Christmases will be for you.  By doing whatever it takes to stop gambling and by focussing on your recovery future Christmases can, like mine, be a hell of a lot better than this one.  Don’t try and do it on your own though – if that worked then none of us would be here.

 Merry Christmas everyone.

 

[Monica1]

I agree, Christmas is quite big in my recovery too. Last Xmas 4 months into recovery I was destitute, no presents, Ill, deeply depressed and upset that I couldn’t buy any presents, first year ever.
This year, I am working and can afford nice Xmas presents, I am going to book a spring holiday and just feel much better about life. The benefits of being gamble free now for a year and four months. The big debts r still untackled but I will start that in the New Year. In it for the long haul.

[charles]

I am glad you are seeing the difference this year monica.

The good news is that recovery is progressive as well – it’s one day at a time but this time next year things could very well be better still.

Enjoy your Christmas.

[i-did-it]

Reaching my second gamble free pay means that I don’t have to worry about running out of money in January as I have managed to save a little.

It also means that I didn’t have to wait for my money coming into the bank in the morning to go buy staff presents at a ridiculously early hour – it took the whole stress out of Christmas.

Finally being gamble free has given my hope for the future – instead of planning survival I am planning trips and decorating. It has meant I could be generous to those less fortunate than me and I have smiled a lot more this Christmas spreading the joy .

[lizbeth4]

Instead of buying cheap stuff and worrying about money, this Christmas all presents were bought beforehand. I was able to afford good food. I donated to several organizations also. The big difference between this Christmas and last Christmas was my attitude. I was relaxed and happy and really enjoyed myself. This all happened because gambling wasn’t in the picture.

[Author]

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